Will to Live

White Hollycock

Dinner was announced just then and the girls exchanged nervous glances. "It's almost time for--you know." Adelaide said.

Katharin shook her head as they both made their way toward one of the long tables that was being carried out by servants. The table was quickly set and, after the Kaiser had seated himself, the nobles seated themselves. Dish after dish was carried out. Adelaide took a little of each. Katharin contented herself with a bit of meat and a few vegetables.

Everyone was finishing the fruit that had been served for dessert when an usher mounted the dais and blared a trumpet. Everard stood poised at the bottom of the stairs, a paper clenched in his hand.

"The Markgraf Everard Kafistania." the usher called. Silence reigned as Everard slowly mounted the stairs.

Again, Adelaide's heart and stomach traded spots. Her entire future hung on Everard's next words. Should he call her name, civil war starting with the death of her father threatened. If not, she would be sent back to Lundhoffe with a questionable future. Her own life would probably be forfeit, but she'd rather lose it than risk the lives of her people. A marriage to Everard would be catastrophic in that it would cause the deaths of many good people yet she felt that their would be no personal loss. Her future hung thick in the air, suffocating her. Her fingers found her sleeve and began twisting.

Katharin sat straighter, summoning all her strength. If her name was called, gone was the life she had always wanted. She must lose her books and her secret sword lessons. If Everard chose her, she determined to ask him for both of these and if he refused, she must resign herself to a life of drudgery. She forced the nervousness and swallowed hard. This was it. Heaven help her.

He couldn't choose her. Ava had someone else. She glanced to Herzog Frieknaf. His eyes sought hers as well. Ava's mind swirled as she imagined a life with the Herzog. And yet, here she was. Competing for a marriage to a Markgraf, though he would be Herzog when his father was gone. She pursed her lips in disgust. She'd be forced to trade her entire life and hopes and dreams for little more than a boy saddled with a title. Again, her eyes found Herzog Frieknaf's. What was he feeling now?

Matilda lounged back, ignoring the askance looks the other ladies around her were giving her. She was the obvious choice. Not one of the other girls wanted to marry Everard and he knew it. She was the only one. She knew he'd let her continue riding and hunting and fighting. Of course he would. He had to. In turn, she'd bear his children. It was a good trade. And he wasn't bad looking, either. His eyes met hers as he turned. She gave him a big smile and he grinned back, though his legs were shaking.

Adelaide watched Everard open his mouth, then close it a few times before he began to read from the paper.

"Kaiser and fellow nobles. We have come together on the day of--of my--of my marriage." He squinted and craned his head to read the paper. "Of my marriage proposal. Today is the day that--that marks the--" Silence. He stared at the paper for a little while, then glanced up. His eyes sought out Matilda. She was smiling hugely. Adelaide felt relief. Obviously, Matilda was his choice. Beside her, Katharin seemed to relax as well.

"I'm sorry." Everard gave a small laugh. "I can't do this. Read this, I mean. I mean, well, that I'd rather just say it in my own words, in my own way, if that's all right with you all."

"Aye! Aye! Aye!" cries rang from all around the room.

Everard smiled. "Thank you. I'm sure by now you all have figured out why you're here, so I'll spare you the formalities. Thank you, Kaiser, for visiting us today. I know I do not deserve your presence."

The Kaiser smiled graciously and waved his hand. "Get on with it, boy."

Everard smiled and ducked his head. "This has been a very hard week for me. As we had decided to divide the week out so that I might spent each day with one girl, I spent the first day with Ava. I was immediately struck by her intelligence and wisdom. Ava would make any man proud to have her as his wife. Next, I spent the day with Adelaide. We went to visit the village. Her love for people made me admire her as well. I went hunting with Matilda. She is courageous and strong beyond anything I've ever seen in a woman. I found myself admiring her friendliness among many other things. Lastly, I spent the day with Katharin. We spent the day outside, simply wandering through the gardens. Katharin showed me a simplicity and purity spiced with gentle intelligence."

"Get on with it, boy!" Herzog Kafistania yelled with a laugh.

Everard laughed as well. "I simply wish to say that I found each of these girls wonderful and someone I would want to marry, but I also took their own wishes into consideration. Ava, I know you can never love me as you should, as your heart belongs to another. I wish you well."

"Thank you, sir." Ava beamed. Herzog Brunheim gave her a smile and she returned it with an eagerness that made Adelaide smile from where she watched.

"As far as I know, there are no barriers between me and the affections of the other girls. After careful consideration, I've made my decision."

Adelaide gripped the edge of the bench she was sitting on, praying hard that he wouldn't choose her. Matilda sat forward, clearly ready for him to call her name. Katharin sat straight and tall, rigid in her nervousness. Everard locked eyes with Adelaide. In his eyes, she read all the longing in the world. He opened his mouth, not taking his eyes away from hers. With a sense of dread, Adelaide realized that it was her name that he was about to say. Her breath hitched and she cringed in anticipation.