but why me ? (Troyler fanfic )

chapter 16

* TRIGGER WARNING !! FOR THIS CHAPTER *

~Troyes pov~

When i got home i decided  to just go to my room and text sage that i was home.

Text message : im home now

I layed back in my bed putting my phone under my pillow kicking of my shoes and getting under the covers, i got my Tv remote  andstarted scanning  threw the channels when ,

" why where you out so long, with that other fag troye huh " my dad came in he had sages phone in his hand,he was the one texting not sage,just to get me back to the house,

" Wheres  sage !" I shouted

"Shes at her friends house " he said

" and tyde !? "

" with her "

" ok ..well get out of my room im going to sleep" he got up from my bed

"Fine your a worthless  piece  of shit anyways"

*he closed the door*

That, that was all it took to get me to brake my eyes like a ocean , me pressing my face in too my pillow  trying to forget what he said, it was true tho i am a worthless piece of shit , i dont deserve  to be here , my minds racing  and i cant stop it, i think its time now,

I grabe a paper and pen and start writting

~the sucide  letter from Troye sivan ~

I know you all dont love me i know im worthlees and dont deserve  to be here, so im making it easier  and helping you guys with that, i loved you dad since i was a little boy but i never said it anymore of the chance of you getting mad ,and Mom i love you soo much i dont want to leave you but its for the good of this town if i was just gone
Tell tyde and sage i love them and ill be watching them  ~Love your dead son Troye

I put my shoes on and grabed my phone a couple pairs of pants and some t-shirts , i headed down stars making sure nobody was around, i left the note on the kitchen table ,iqhwnt out aide and started walking to rhe end of the street when i got there i took out my phone and called Tyler,

*Phone call*
"Hey tyler can you come pick me up at the corner  of my street"

"Sure troye whats wrong "

"I tell you when you come"

Tyler got there 15 mins later

I was getting nervous he was gonna ask soon eveeytime i got nervous  i always ended  up singing  this song iv been writring it helped  me calm down, so i started ainging it like tyler wasnt there

* turn fun on if you want to like have it so you can hear or whatever*

( But don't you wanna see the world, boy
All the countries and the stars, boy
Just don't look them in the eyes, boy
You just gotta take their lives, boy
Let me take you for a drive, boy
Oh I swear you'll feel alive, boy

All you gotta do is trust that I'm being true
And do it for the people who love you

Let's go have fun, you and me in the old Jeep
Ride around town with our rifles on the front seat
Fun, you and me in the Middle East
Shooting at rocks, bullets cocked in the midday
Son, you and me in the old Jeep
Ride around town with our rifles on the front seat
Fun, you and me in the Middle East
Shooting at rocks, bullets cocked in the midday

Son, listen to what I tell you
You'll see, my son
Now you know what you gotta do
Let's go have fun)

I finshed singing the song, i could feel me calming down

"Wow th- that was Amzing" did he just say what i thought he said,Nobody has ever told me im good before i alway wanted to sing but to scared to do it in front of people,

"Thanks ty" i whispered, i feel a little better now but i can still feel my heart aching from my dads words I love him i really do but just hurts to know your dad hates you,

We got to Tyler house he parked his car in the drive wayy

Troye :  "Hey-umm ty " 

Tyler: "yea troye "

Troye : "is it ok if i stay here for a couple of days "

Tyler: yea thata fine gives us lots of time for our project remember "

Troye : "oh yea....thanks ty"

I totally forgot about are project due next week, we had nothing done we should probably  start it i dont want Tyler getting a bad grade because  of me,

Troye : should  we go work on it now !?

Tyler: yea you can go up to my room im gonna get some stuff "

I walked up to Tylers room which seemed like forever seens theres so many staris,  when i opened the door i chould smell  a candle it was very flowerly like it smelled so good, it made me happy out of no where,its smell was so strong and sweet, Tyler came in has i was sitting on the b3d he had different things like scissors,tape and glue

A/N
OK GUYS IM SRY THIS IS NOT ALL THE SAD STUFF I JUST WANTED TO UPDATE FOR YOU GUYS  SOOO YEA MORE TOMMOROW AND OMG GUYSS

TYLER FREAKING OAKLEY LIKED MY INSTAGRAM  PICTURE !!! I WAS 2 HOURS LATE TO SCHOOL LOL  OMG IT HAS 500 LIKES NOW :O MY PHONE  WOULD NOT STOO BEEPING LOL

OMG IM STUCK LISENING  TO THUS SONG CALLED TALKING BODY BY TOVE LO ITS AMAZING  I MIGHT BEW THINKING ABOUT TROYLER WHEN LISENING  OOPS

ANYWAYS !!! LOVE YOU GUYS ♡♡

TWITTER -JESSIOTPTROYLER

INSTAGRAM - OHSNAPITSTROYLER  / (PERSONAL ) : HIMYNAMESJESSI

TUMBLR -JESSIOTPTROYLERR ( YEESS TWO R'S)