You're Mine

Chapter Fourteen: All Alone

I awake to find strong arms loosely wrapped around me with my back against a firm chest; I look behind me to see a sleeping Ash. I turn onto my side and lightly brush the hair out of his face. What would I do without you? The thought crosses my mind as my chest begins to have an all too familiar ache. But I ask too much of you sometimes, don't I? I carefully slip away from his embrace as I try not to wake him. He slightly stirs before he buries his face in his pillow. I look around the room for my cellphone and my little pick me up. I place the last cigarette in my pocket before I leave with my shoes in hand.

With my mind swirling with thoughts, I didn't notice how far I walked until a large gust of wind blew past me. My hair whipped with the breeze, instantly chilling me. I look up and see that I've walked to the clearing from that night. The night that changed everything or tried to at least. Walking further in, I find the spot where everything happened. The snow may have covered the footsteps to it, but the trees blocked it from all being covered. Seeing the blood spatters on it, makes my stomach twist into knots. My legs begin to feel weak, so I sit before they give out. How did everything end up like this? How much more do I lose before it's all gone?

I didn't realize how long I had stayed out there until I could hear my name being called. I look at the butt of my cigarette still smoldering next to me. I put it out with my shoe before I walk away from the spot that will add to my guilt. As I walk up the hill, I see Kara looking for me. She calls my name again before I yell to her, "I'm over here!"

She turns and looks at me. She breathes a sigh of relief before she jogs over to me. "There you are! We couldn't find you anywhere. Did you not hear me yelling?" She asks me.

"Sorry, I must have been lost to my thoughts," I tell her with a sheepish smile as I tuck my hair behind my ear. The wind keeps blowing it in my face.

"Let's get you inside before you catch a cold," She says as she grabs my hand. "Jesus! Your hands are freezing Cassie. How long were you out here?" She asks me as we begin walking back.

"An hour maybe?" I tell her quite unsure of the answer myself. "Sorry for worrying you, I just needed a minute to clear my head and think over some things," I sigh out as I avoid her concerned gaze. "I need to tell you and Ash something when we get back in. I think it's time for you guys to learn the truth," I quietly tell her. 

"Cassie, are you okay?" She asks me as we stop walking. "You're starting to scare me," She says as she looks at me.

I avoid her looks and just keep walking to the house. Time to pop our happy bubble, I just hope you will forgive me. I think as I walk up the steps and into the warmth of the house. Once inside, I go to the sitting area and sit down on the couch. My knee bounces from my nerves as I try to gather my thoughts. I twiddle my thumbs as I hear the front door shut as Kara comes inside. She yells Ash's name and he soon joins us. I wait for them to sit down before I look up at them. "So, I've concluded that it's time for you two to know the truth," I tell them.

"Cas, what are you talking about? What truth exactly?" He questions me as he looks from me to her.

"That's what I'm trying to find out," She tells him with a shrug. "When I found her outside, she said we needed to know something," She says as she leans back on the couch.

I take a deep breath and look at them. I can feel my nerves getting worse, but I can't back down. "I guess to tell you guys the truth; I need to start at the beginning," I tell them.

They look at me confused before his eyes widen in shock. "You mean the beginning, beginning?" He asks me.

I nod my head and take a deep breath. "So Ash knows this part, but I never told you, Kara. It's not because I don't trust you, but I don't like talking about it," I look at her, "I didn't want you to judge me or give me that pity look that everyone gives me," I explain to her.

She gives a confused look. "Cassie, I would never judge you. I mean I question your fashion choices, but I would never judge you," She tells me.

I give a small, uneasy smile before I begin, "Thirteen years ago, I experienced one of the worst nights of my life," I pause to take a deep breath, "Alister and I don't like talking about it," I tell them.

Ash moves over beside me and takes my hand. He gives it a gentle, reassuring squeeze. "You don't have to do this," He whispers to me.

I take another deep breath and continue, "The worst night of my life happened all those years ago. I was seven, and it was the night after Halloween. I didn't learn this until later, but I was woken up by gunshots. I ended up finding my mother's body from her being murdered. The police still don't know who did it, but they did know it was a crime of passion. We thought he was long gone since it's been so long. However, Halloween night after the party, I learned that he was back. He wasn't done and won't be until he gets me," I say as I look down at my hands. I can feel myself beginning to shake as my emotions try to break free.

"How do you know it's the same guy?" She looks at me in shock. "How do you know that he wants you?" She asks me.

"I'm getting there just give me a second," I tell her as my knee starts bouncing again.

"Take your time," He rubs my back, "You don't have to push yourself," He softly tells me.

"You guys deserve the truth. I can't keep hiding it from you especially when you're being affected by it now. I know it's the same guy because of the calling card he left me. He knew of my mother's anniversary which only a select few knew of. He also is the one who killed Erin; he didn't die by suicide as the police said. They thought I would be safe leaving everything behind. I didn't know he would find me. I never imagined that he would attack especially during a Christmas party," I look at Kara with my eyes beginning to gloss over from tears, "I'm so sorry," I tell her.

She gets up from the couch and begins to pace. "That happened because of all this going on," She says as she looks at me.

I get up and walk over to her. "I was told that everyone would be safe. That's why they tighten security and brought more people in. They said that your mother," I don't get to finish as pain shoots through my cheek. I bring my hand up to it as I look at her in shock.

She lowers her hand and looks at me coldly. "My mother was shot because of you!" She yells at me. "You're the reason my home was attacked, that those men were here, and I almost lost someone!" She roars out as her hands curl into fists by her side.

"Kara, I'm so sorry! I didn't know that any of this would happen," I plead with her as the tears break free.

She goes to hit me again, but Ash catches her hand. "Enough!" He declares as he steps between us. "You're seriously blaming her for all this?" He asks her as she jerks her arm free.

"Yes!" She cries out. "If she never came here none of this would have happened. This is all her fault," She spits out.

"Kara, do you hear yourself?" He asks as his voice begins to rise in volume. "You're blaming her for something that is out of her control. She didn't ask for any of this, so how can you point fingers at her like that!" He yells in shock.

She looks at him with a glare. "You knew didn't you?" She accuses him before she starts hitting his chest in rage. "You knew and you protected her while you watched me cry and lose my mind!" She yells at him.

"Kara! He didn't know about any of this, so you be mad at him," I tell her as I try to wipe the tears from my face.

"Just shut up!" She shouts at me. Her breathing is starting to become ragged as rage fills her even more.

He looks at me with sadness in his blue eyes which makes them appear a darker icy blue. "You don't need to be alone either. Damn it, I can't you Cas. I know things are crazy right now, but she's just upset. You leaving won't fix anything," He pleas with me.

I look at him with a sad smile. "I'm sorry, but you can't stop me," I pause as I pick bags up and look at him. "If you love me at all or value our friendship, you'll stay here. You'll stay here, help her, and be safe at least," I whisper.

"Same applies to you!" He sidesteps in front of so the door is blocked. "It's a two-way street," He argues back at me.

"I guess I don't love you," I whisper before I push past him. I then bolt to the front door and leave despite hearing my name being called. I don't stop until I can't hear them anymore. I'm sorry. I hope you two can forgive me one day for choosing to be alone.