Weathered Angel

○Twelve○

Eden

Begrudgingly, I slipped on the white tank top and shorts I had been handed. I wanted to be more covered up, but Doctor Tsing said it would be a hindrance for accessibility.

After having some time to think about everything that was explained to me, I wasn't sure I wanted to go ahead with another procedure. Tsing described it as a series of quick procedures that should hurt less and less the more I have it done. The thought of pain made the hairs on the back of my neck stand to points.

Cage then explained that it would help me feel better and be better. He said it would help me be the best version of myself, whatever that was supposed to mean. He described it in such a way that had made me want to do it. The eloquence in his wording painted a desirable image and planted precarious seeds in my head. Cage knew about my mobility problems and he said they could fix it. He knew that I wanted it all to go away, yet now I had second thoughts.

Once I had changed, I nervously stepped out of the tiny room and turned to face Cage who had been waiting for me.

"Ready?"

"I'm not sure I want to do this anymore." I wrapped my arms around myself and peeked cautiously at Cage.

"Why? What happened?"

Cage didn't sound angry, but I knew how much he wanted this for me and I didn't want to upset him.

"You can talk to me."

"I- I don't think I can handle anymore. And what if something goes wrong or it doesn't work."

"We talked about this. They're non-invasive procedures. They're designed to make you feel better, make you stronger, stop the voices in your head you spoke about. You won't have to worry about the Outsiders and you're so-called friends and ex-boyfriend because they'll be scared of you."

"What if I don't want them to be scared of me?"

"The only way to be protected from Outsiders is for them to fear you. They've scarred you for life. Do you really want to run from them for the rest of your life?"

"No."

"And your friends. They don't care about you. One of them pushed you off a cliff. Another stabbed you. One of them got you hung. Some have tried to kill you. It sounds like they're acting out of fear and jealousy. Instead of them fearing you and having the power, wouldn't you want it the other way. To stop your pain. To stop your suffering. You hold the power."

Despite the talks we have had, I didn't properly remember telling him some of those things. Nevertheless, I supposed he was somewhat right.

"What if it doesn't work. Have you done this before?"

"Yes. We've done it before. But what matters is your mental and physical health. This will benefit you and I can promise after the first one or two times it will start to feel better."

I was confused. I didn't know what I should do and the longer I stared at Cage, the more I felt I needed to do what he said. After all, he was looking after me

○▪︎○

I weaved between the still bodies circling each one. Their skin was pale and grey like statues tainted with punches of bruising colours and flushed reds. It was as if life was exploding and battling from the inside, like reapers to get out.

I edged towards the last uncovered figure. My mouth was dry and my breathing was raspy. The material felt rough between my fingertips. Too rough, like I shouldn't touch it, but the need to uncover the mystery was overpowering.