Keep Going

"Aloha means family. And family means no one gets left behind."

Devon says he's noticed a change in my behaviour.

I don't know what he's talking about.

I've only been awake for nearly a week now.

Yet today he's acting strange again. Like he's constantly on the phone and he keeps telling me everything is "fine".

I decided to confront him about it.
Devon gulps before asking, "Have you done...any research on your family?"

I give an honest shake of the head although I say, "I know my parents committed suicide, I have a younger brother, my grandparents raised me and I consider my grandad to be my biggest influence."

Devon nods. He seems more comfortable now.
Looking around, he tells me, "Well basically your brother wants to come around, to tell you more about your family. I told him that I wasn't sure whether that was what you wanted."

I shrug. "I don't mind. If he wants to see me...why not?"

Devon sighs before giving me what he thinks is an assuring smile, when in reality, he looks like a dog that has shit itself.

"He can come over today, I'll take the kids to their gran if you want."

I nod in appreciation although inside, I'm wincing and a bit hurt by the fact the children don't have grandparents on my side.

Devon wanders away, presumably to call my brother, leaving me to tend to the kids.

"Mummy..." Matty whines, "do you remember anything about me?"
I hesitate. "Maybe."

That was a fucking mistake.

"My favourite colour?"
"Blue?"
"Favourite toy?"
"Teddy bear?"
"Favourite food?"
"Chocolate?"
"What I want to be when I grow up?"
"Um...an astronaut?"

Matty burst into tears and again Daniella gives me a look, although this one is laced with disappointment.

"I get them wrong?"
"All of them!" Matty roars, "You're not my mummy!"

Daniella escorts her brother out the room.
She turns back, only to tell me, "His favourite colour is red, his favourite toy is a fire truck, his favourite food is tacos and he wants to be a soccer player when he's older, just like you."
With that, she leaves the room, leaving me to my thoughts once more.

How shit of a mom am I?

Devon reappears, to say "Tyler says he can come around in twenty minutes."
I frown for a minute, before realising that Tyler is my brother.
"What does he work as?"
Devon appears surprised that I've asked, before replying, "He's a doctor. He's off today though."

Now he's left the room, leaving me to my worries.
Barring Kristine, I seem to get along well with my old teammates.
Family seems to be a struggle though.

The twenty odd minutes seems to speed past as the doorbell rings, Devon says his byes and take the children, leaving me with my supposed sibling.

Tyler's tall, with a beard and a fringe. He has dark framed specs that appear ever so slightly oversized in my opinion.
As we shake hands, I see a tattoo on his wrist that interests me.

"Aloha means family and family means no one gets left behind"

Appropriate in this situation? Jury's out.

We sit down, on different leather sofas and Tyler already appears emotional.

"So..." Tyler looks to me, "do you want me to start from the start?"
I frown. "What do the mean?"
Tyler appears deep in thought. "I can tell you about both our parents backstories."