Tattoos

Chapter 20

Constant beeping fills Hisoka's mind for a moment, annoying him beyond compare. Slowly other noises come into play. Quiet voices which he can soon place as Gon, Illumi, Machi, and Killua. Are they all in his room? That's rather annoying. Let him sleep... Despite the feeling, he brings an arm up to his forehead, snapping his eyes open at the strange feeling it brings.

The first thing he notices is the IV stuck in his elbow, not exactly painful, but uncomfortable. Then looking around he finds himself in a hospital room? What? His gaze flickers to where his friends are huddled together, all looking rather distressed.

"Hey," Hisoka's voice croaks. "Wha-"

"Hisoka!" Illumi interrupts, practically launching himself at Hisoka, hugging him awkwardly since he's in bed.

"Hey, hey," Hisoka hugs back, rubbing Illumi's back. "I'm here, it's okay."

"You're an idiot Hisoka," Illumi practically growls, pulling away appearing both angry and upset.

Hisoka blinks at him before glancing at the IV. So... Why is he here? He glances back at them in confusion. Did he drink too much or something?

"You really don't know why you're here?" Even Gon sounds angry. "You're an absolute dumbass."

"Enlighten me," Hisoka hums, looking at them expectantly. He really had no idea why he was here.

"Hisoka," Machi shakes her head and sits on the edge of the bed. "You passed out during your dance class."

"Uh... So?" Hisoka raises a brow, plenty of people pass out. Not that he can say he ever has, even when he overworked himself. At least... Not during dance. It has happened before...

"You haven't eaten properly in... weeks? Months?" Machi says slowly.

Hisoka frowns, desperately trying to recall. He hasn't? But he's eaten... He remembers eating. "What?" He finally manages to get out.

"Yep, he's a lost cause. He's an idiot! A true born idiot!" Gon huffs, throwing his arms in the air. Killua throws Gon a look before looking back at Hisoka.

"You're treating your body like shit and it finally caught up to you," Killua clarifies.

Illumi isn't speaking, his face blank to anyone who didn't know him, but his eyes are a turmoil. He's upset with Hisoka... Of course, he is, Hisoka is a mess. According to his friends, he can't even take care of himself and he doesn't even realize. Fuck... Fuck Hisoka is no good. He runs a hand through his hair frustratedly as he inwardly hates on himself. How could he not realize? The others wait silently, letting it sink in for him.

"I had no idea," Hisoka mutters. "I'm sorry."

"Why are you apologizing Hisoka? It's not your fault," Machi says softly. "As your friends, we should have noticed what was going on."

"Yeah," Gon shakes his head. "I should've never let you get this bad. I should've warned everyone else... I knew you always forgot..." His brow is furrowed, Killua taking Gon's hand.

Hisoka blinks a few times, realizing they weren't mad at him, they were mad at themselves for never realizing. But that isn't their fault... How could they know? Hisoka doesn't even realize what he does.

"It's no one's fault," Killua says softly. "But now we know, so we can all watch out for Hisoka."

Hisoka frowns. "You shouldn't have to-"

"Hisoka, we're your friends. We'll have your back whether you like it or not... You're allowed home when your IV is done." Machi says, taking Hisoka's hand to squeeze it. "I'll take the boys home, Illumi will take you back after. Okay?"

Hisoka smiles. "Of course." He slips easily back into his charismatic component and Machi laughs lightly, leading the boys out of the room.

Illumi takes Hisoka hand and puts it to his cheek. "I was scared, Hisoka," Illumi scolds.

"I'm sorry, Illumi," Hisoka responds softly, rubbing his thumb on Illumi's cheek.

They sit together in silence for a while, Illumi crawling into the small bed to join Hisoka. Hisoka continues to run his fingers in Illumi's hair while Illumi traces around his tattoos.

"You should rely on me more," Illumi speaks suddenly. "I've leaned on you... Why don't you ever lean on me?"

Hisoka knows the answer. Because Illumi won't like him once he hears about his problems. "Sorry, I'll try harder."

Illumi seems to take the answer for the time being. Illumi gets up noticing the IV is out and shortly after a nurse comes in to dispatch Hisoka. Hisoka feels mostly fine... He stands and pulls on his sweatshirt before Illumi takes his hand and leads them out.

"The fluids were to get you going again, but you're going to actually have to eat... How do you forget to eat?" Illumi huffs.

Hisoka purses his lips. "In the orphanage, I prioritized getting the kids something to eat. And I helped look after them, so I guess, I just always forgot then and I kinda got used to the little food... I've had this happen before." He admits. "I just wasn't hospitalized for it. And in the circus, well, food was already scarce so..."

"Orphanage?" Illumi pauses. Hisoka chews his lip, guess he just admitted one of his many flaws. Not that him growing up in the orphanage was entirely private information, but it stayed clear of media thanks to him pulling strings.

"Yeah... I was left there after my time in the circus," So that's half the truth.

"Where are your parents? In the circus?" Illumi seems genuinely curious.

Hisoka shrugs a little. "No idea, the person who raised me in the circus found me on the side of the road..." He pauses, realizing he had said more than he wanted.

"Do you wonder about your parents?"

"No."

Illumi simply nods and walks into the apartment complex, Hisoka in tow. When Hisoka walks into his apartment he winces at the sudden noise. Leorio and Kurapika happen to also be there, Pika working away at some kind of sauce on the stove.

Gon and Killua getting plates out, arguing about who knows what, Machi clearing off the table in the living room.

"Oh good," Leorio smiles at Hisoka. "Foods almost ready."