Who knew birds could be fucking noisy in the wee hours of dawn? Their constant twittering woke me up at five in the morning. Dahil hindi mainit kagabi ay pinatay ko ang aircon at binuksan ang mga bintana. It was obviously a mistake.
Asar na sinarado ko ulit ang mga bintana at pinaandar ang aircon para makatulog ulit. Kaya mas lalo akong nainis nang may kumatok sa kuwarto para gisingin ako.
"Ano ba!" singhal ko sa katulong na kumatok nang binuksan ko ang pintuan.
"Ahhh Señorito... gumising na raw po kayo para bumaba at... at mamahaw este mag-agahan."
Napansin ko kaagad na natakot siya sa inasta ko pero wala akong pakialam.
"Bakit, sinabi ko ba na gisingin 'nyo 'ko? Ang aga-aga pa!" Aamba na sana akong isarado ang pinto nang pinigilan niya.
"Pag 'di mo tinanggal ang kamay mo, maiipit ka! Bahala ka!" I warned without bothering to look at her.
"Renz, ang lolo mo ang nag-utos kay Nang Sol na gisingin ka. Gusto ni Don Isong na sabay kayong mag-agahan."
It was her. Again. Her voice was apologetic and gentle but it didn't do anything to pacify me.
I'm not in the mood to be nice but I can see I don't really have a choice. Malakas kong isinirado ang pinto at kung hindi niya pa binawi agad ang kamay niya ay siguradong may buto siya sa mga daliri na mababali. Whatever. I warned them. Buwisit.
Pagbaba ko ay nasa hapag-kainan na sina Lolo at Lena. The old man coughed unpleasantly as I came in late, making sure I was aware of his disapproval. Sinandal ko ang crutches sa isang silya at umupo na nga.
"Sa susunod, siguraduhin mo na handa ka na para sa agahan pagdating ng alas sais. Trenta minutos ang agahan at kailangan kong umalis agad papunta sa plantasyon. Kung maaantala ang nakagawiang iskedyul ay maapektuhan ang systema." His voice was stern and his white brows were pulled down and sloped towards the middle, clearly showing his displeasure.
Hindi na sana ako sasagot dahil asar din ako pero siniko ako ni Lena sa tagiliran sa ilalim ng lamesa.
"Opo."
That was uncharacteristic of me. Kahit ang ermat ko ay hindi ako napagsasabihan. There was something intimidating in my grandfather though. He simply commanded respect.
"Hindi ko alam kung paano ka pinalaki ng Mama mo, pero dito sa pamamahay ko, sabay-sabay kumakain ang pamilya."
Hindi na ako umimik at suwerte na hindi na rin siya nagsalita ulit.
🌿
Ang kabilin-bilinan sa'kin ni Mama ay sumama raw ako sa plantasyon, tumulong daw ako, etcetera. Sa madaling salita, sumipsip ako. Alam ko na ang takbo ng isip niya.
My father didn't really leave a lot of money since he died young. Nabuhay kami sa suporta na rin ni Lolo. The thing is, my mother isn't really sure my grandfather would keep supporting us after I turn twenty-one. Even though I'm only nineteen years old now, trust my mother to already be plotting how she's gonna keep the money coming in.
Kunsabagay, lahat naman ng gusto ko binibigay niya kaya hindi na dapat ako magreklamo. Isa pa, sabi nga niya, may karapatan naman kami sa kung ano ang mayroon si Lolo dahil nag-iisang apo niya ako.
The old man, however, refused to take me to the damn plantation. Magpagaling daw muna ako at makaaabala lang ako dahil sa pilay ko. O eh di sige.
Medyo mainit ang kuwarto ko dahil tapat sa araw. Isa pa ay makulit ang mga katulong na lumabas daw ako para makalanghap naman ng sariwang hangin. Sa huli, dala na rin ng kabagutan ay naglakad-lakad ako sa buong bahay; iika-ika nga lang.
Maganda pa rin naman ang mansyon. It is not to my taste though. Mas gusto ko 'yong mga modern style na nakikita sa Maynila. Ang mga tao kasi rito mukhang hindi makaalis sa nakaraan. Kunsabagay, nasa dulo yata itong islang ito ng Pilipinas. *
Gusto ko man maglakad-lakad sa labas ay hindi ko magawa dahil nga may bali ako sa paa, resulta ng race namin ng mga kaibigan ko. Malakas ang loob ko na makipag-paligsahan pero minalas at naaksidente. Ilang linggo pa ay puwede nang tanggalin ang cast ko sa paa. 'Yon nga lang ay nagpauto ako kay Mama na umuwi ng Guimaras sa ancestral house ng mga Peñalver.
Naglinis ang isang katulong sa kuwarto ko kaya minabuti ko muna na lumabas. I didn't wanna run into Lena so I entered the library fast.
Mabuti pa ay matulog muna ako sa sofa! Hihiga na nga sana ako nang mamataan ang isang litrato na naka-kuwadro; litrato ng dalawang tao na sa tingin ko ay mag-ama. Sina Lolo at Papa. My father looked like he was about ten or eleven, nakaupo siya sa isang kabayo habang hawak naman ni Lolo ang tali nito. Para silang pinagbiyak na buto. Pareho pa silang mukhang seryoso at hindi man lang nakangiti kahit kaunti.
"Siya ang Papa mo, hindi ba?"
This girl is stealthy. I had not even noticed her entering, but can now hear the tell-tale sound from the plate she had been holding when she placed it carefully on the table. Puno 'yon ng mga cupcake na sa pagkakaalam ko ay gawa niya sa tulong na rin ni Nang Sol. I refrained from replying, and lay down heavily on the sofa instead.
"Mahilig ka ba magbasa?" She came closer and sat on the couch in front of the sofa.
I shook my head as I closed my eyes to discourage her from talking to me.
"Ako, gustong-gusto ko magbasa. Lalo na 'yong tungkol sa mga malalayong lugar at mga taong nakatira doon."
Her voice somewhat grew softer and I opened one eye to see her walk towards some shelves in a darker corner.
She reverently touched the spines of the books on display and then gingerly pulled one. I closed my eye just in time before she turned towards me again.
*"The Letters of Vita Sackville-West to Virginia Woolf. Isa ito sa mga pinakapaborito ko."
I resigned myself to a monologue which this girl is seemingly determined to give. I wonder if she talks to the furniture too.
"Gusto mo ba na basahan kita? Okay lang kung... kung makatulog ka..."
Her gentle voice sounded tentative but I still refused to give her a reply.
I heard her soft footsteps walking back to sit on the couch, before the rustle of the pages.
**"...But oh my dear, I can't be clever and stand-offish with you: I love you too much for that. Too truly. You have no idea how stand-offish I can be with people I don't love. I have brought it to a fine art. But you have broken down my defenses. And I don't really resent it."
🌿
The sole reason why I ended up spending so much time with her was that I wanted to avoid the helpers who were all too curious about my mother and the life we have in Manila. If Lena was curious, she must have kept it to herself as she never probed. Maybe because she also did most of the talking. At first, I wouldn't be listening but eventually, I'd come to realize I was actually eagerly hanging on to whatever she was saying.
Lagi laman ng kaniyang mga kuwento ang tatay niya na namatay ilang taon na ang nakararaan. Kung magbabaliktanaw ako ngayon, mapagtatanto ko na malamang punong-puno siya ng pangungulila noon.
To be truthful, she managed to fill the empty hours in that lonely house, but I never told her that. Whenever I felt like I was starting to get too engrossed with her story, I'd cut her with a curt word or I'd simply walk away. It never daunted her though. She was simply too stupid or naïve.
🌿
Author's Note:
*Renz is actually geographically wrong. Guimaras, which is found between the islands of Panay and Negros, is located near the center of the Philippines.
**I changed the passage quoted on this chapter from Sonnet 116 by W. Shakespeare to a love letter written to Virginia Woolf.
BINABASA MO ANG
Unlike Any Other
Romance|COMPLETED| "Gusto kita. Gusto talaga kita, Renz. Simula pa nang unang dating mo rito sa Guimaras." The summer Lorenzo Peñalver III was sent home to Aguadulce was unlike any other one he had before... It was in that small town that he came to know h...
