Boarding with the Bad Boy [COMPLETE + BONUS published edition]

THE BOARDERS: 31

Lo

How dare he? Just when I think things might actually be getting better, Sam goes ahead and does something like this. What the hell is wrong with the boy? Yes, I wanted an apology. Yes, I wanted him to reject Brandon and admit his feelings toward me. But not like that. Not with a quarter of the grade watching, ready to post and text and talk about it for all of eternity. Which, okay, I know it won't go on forever—but it will feel like it.

What's worse: he looked so earnest and serious up there, telling all our classmates that he screwed up, it made me want to kiss him. Which is the exact feeling I'm trying to rid myself of. Goddammit. (Oh, and by the way, I didn't hear him mention Annie freaking O'Hara up there, so he's still lying to me because he thinks I. don't. know.)

I curse aloud, swinging my locker shut and stomping through the Math and Science building toward the quad. Calc is my last class of the day, and there's no way I'm going back in there, so I might as well spend some time in the fall sunlight before practice. Or perhaps I can get a jumpstart on my run. Lord knows I need it; I feel like I could go forever today.

"Lo!" I jolt at the sound of my name, whipping around. I'm prepared to chew out whoever's trying to stop me leaving, but I can't quite bring myself to do it when I see Jared loping in my direction.

"What do you want?" I mutter, continuing my exodus from the school. I'd love for Jared to take the hint that I don't want to talk to him, but I already know he won't. As I suspect, I hear the door open just after it's clanged shut behind me, and Jared's shoes tap down the stairs double-time until he catches me.

"Hey," he says, catching my shoulder. "You okay?"

I pause, looking at him and swiping furiously at my eyes, which are filling with tears, completely against my will.

"No, I'm not okay," I mutter. "I'm—" What am I? I'm mad, so much so I'd like to kick and scream and throw a proper tantrum. And I'm sad, because I really wish things with Sam could be easy—could be at all. Which flips me back to angry again.

Jared doesn't seem to need me to finish my sentence. His eyes soften as he watches me. "Look, I know Evans can be a real dick, but I truly think he's trying. He's got a lot of deep-seated shit."

I snort, turning away. "Yeah, no kidding. I'm just not sure I have the capacity to hang around while he figures it all out."

Jared looks like he wants to hug me, but he doesn't step in. I appreciate that. I chew my bottom lip before spitting, "What the hell was that?"

"I think—"

But I don't let him finish. My mouth can't quite keep up with my brain as I curse through my thoughts aloud, on a roll now. Jared lets me roil and whine until I talk myself out. We've made our way clear across the quad by now and I have half a mind to keep going, just walk all the way to...but where? California?

I groan. "And by the way: the thing about Carr. Does he think I'm stupid? That everyone's going to believe he just begged Carr to keep me? And that worked?"

"Oh, that. Yeah." Jared lets it hang, and I catch a hint of something in his voice. I step into his path, searching his eyes. He looks at everything but me.

"What?" When he doesn't answer, I ask again. There's something here.

Jared rolls his eyes. "Dude, between Sam and me, you've gotten us to toss out bro code, like, fifty times. You understand that right?"

I shrug, but I don't let him step around me. It's not worth saying that 'bro code' seems to represent stupid alliances in his group of friends, and if I'm helping to break those, all the better.

"Fine." Jared levels his gaze at me. "But you're not going to like it."

I gesture impatiently into his pause. He looks wary as he says, "Carr is Sam's dad."

And he's right. I don't like it. It's just one more secret Sam's kept from me, one more reminder that Sam wants me only when—and as much as—it's convenient for him.

When I speak next, I surprise even myself. "Do you want to go on a date with me? Tomorrow?"

Jared's face goes from surprised to confused so quickly; I laugh, a cackling, high-pitched laugh that sounds nothing like me. "I thought we decided yesterday: this is friendship only."

I roll my eyes, starting back down the path, headed toward the dorms.

"Uh, Lo?" Jared jogs to catch up. "I hesitate to ask this, but are you having some kind of mental break? Because last time I checked, you had real feelings for Sam—asshole or not—and, uh, cross country's that way." I'm not looking at him, but I can hear when he turns his head in the direction of the fieldhouse.

"Maybe," I admit. "I'm not talking about a real date."

Jared catches my shoulder. "Okay, you need to explain what's going on here. I feel like we just went from 'Lo's going to punch a wall' to 'Lo's going to make a wildly hilarious joke' and it's super confusing."

This sounds like something Jill might say, and I wonder if I should run this crazy plan by her before I put it in motion. But Jared's already here, and I'm already so deep into this hole...may as well lay down and be buried.