The Worst Days of Our Lives

Chapter 20: Candice

Pregnant. The simple 8 letter word stood out boldly. Pregnant. Her hands began to shake, causing her to drop the test. It clattered loudly on to the bathroom floor. She leaned against the unsturdy door of the bathroom, it creaked ever so slightly, but held her weight as her knees buckled and she slid down onto the hard, cold floor. Pregnant. Her eyes were blank slates as her mouth hung slightly ajar, she didn’t know how to process this information. This couldn’t possibly be happening to her, it happened to other people, of course, but it was never suppose to happen to her.

She remembered the first time she thought she was pregnant, Chance had nearly lost his mind. They both spent the entirety of the week her period was due flitting around like nervous hummingbirds with no place to land. They discussed every possible option and outcome and their nights were filled with crying, heart-filled confessions. They had in-depth conversations about the future, if they wanted kids, if they even wanted kids together. Both of them were walking emotional disasters,at least for three days until her late period finally arrived.

Pregnancy scares were just that, they were terrifying. Candice had experienced this terror multiple times throughout her relationship with Chance, but that terror had never become a reality. She had decided long ago that yes, she might want kids some day, maybe. But first she wanted to go to college, she wanted a degree, a career, a chance to take in the real world and not the world that she was limited to by her parents and the other officials around her. She wanted to live truly and freely for the first time. She almost did, mere hours from driving 11 hours in her fully packed Civic, close enough she could taste the loneliness and the bittersweet happiness of leaving.

Her future, well, she wouldn’t say it was ripped from her, Toby did not perform a cruel act that day and she understood that now. He was only protecting her, the delusion she had built up, ‘the real world’ was not what she thought it was and he saved her from having that image shattering and cutting her with all of its dangerous edges. But nevertheless, her future had been changed. She knew she would never get to go to the college she wanted, maybe, someday, Toby would see the importance of education and let her take online classes. At least then she would have a degree, then one day, far in the future, maybe a career.

She knew these were hopes and dreams that even the kindest of men would take from her, but those hopes and dreams had given her a sense of purpose, besides pleasing Toby of course, it gave her a drive, something to obtain. Those eight letters did rip away those hopes now. What would Toby say? He would be disappointed in her, obviously she would feel the flare of shame flit across her skin has she admitted the mistake she allowed to happen. No doubt he would be angry with her she would be receiving a punishment but it was well deserved. These thoughts didn’t scare her for she knew this was her fault it had to be, Toby would never force her to face such up-front brutality of the real world. She must have brought this on her self. No, Candice was terribly worried about what they would do. Abortion? She had never been against abortion, actually, she had always believed that a woman has her own mind and can decide what happens to her own body. She knew now, however, that Toby has far more say in the matter, she was his property, if anything, he had more say.  Would he make her have it? Keep it or adoption? She knew none of his opinions about such a matter but it had never crossed her mind to ask.

She knew that she couldn't possibly have the courage to flat out tell Toby about this. Not nearly strong enough to handle such a task, she considered her options. Today the maids were let off early so she still had an hour before Toby would come through the door. Slowly, she crawled towards the test and picked it up with shaking fingers.

When the door whipped open and the bright light flooded the room, Candice was standing in the kitchen, facing the sink, her back to Toby, the test lying solemnly on the middle of the small table by the door they used for keys. She managed to keep from flinching as the door slammed shut and the rattling of keys stopped abruptly. The silence filled the room like a flash flood, it seemed to steal all the oxygen from the room, heavily pressing on her chest making her throat burn desperately for air.

She didn’t move. she didn’t breathe. Candice remained completely still and immobile until she heard heavy footsteps approaching. She jumped as something white flew by her head, missing her by inches. The test slammed into the wall in front of her and the plastic shattered. “What the fuck is this?” Toby’s growl tore through the thick silence and she felt like he had slapped her back into reality.

Still, she did not have the strength to turn and face him, “I’m sor-” She barely managed to squeak the first syllable of her apology before Toby grabbed her by the shoulder and ripped her away from the counter. Her lip trembled and she felt the tears burning in her eyes as she attempted to hold them back. His chest was rapidly rising and falling, his eyes were burning with anger and loathing. “I didn’t mean for this to happen,” She whispered as she tried to reach out and place a hand on his heaving chest.

Toby grabbed her outstretched hand and tightened his grip quickly until she gasped. Bending her arm backwards, she spun away from him as he pinned her hand to the middle of her back. She whimpered as he shoved her forward, forcing her to bend over the counter as he kept applying pressure to her arm, threatening to snap it, “I don’t care if you meant for it to happen! How could you do that to me? After everything I’ve done for you?” He spat at her venomously and she sobbed, no long holding the tears back, “I know, I know! I’m so sorry,” Her shoulders were shaking as each cry shook her whole body, causing more and more pain to extend from the arm twisted behind her back.

He let her arm go but shoved her, hard. Her foot was caught on the rug and it slipped out from under her, causing her to trip and fall, landing on her side. She hadn’t had time to brace herself, although she didn’t weigh much, her full body mass slamming down against the hard floor made her ribs shake. She attempted to bite back the scream as her ribs tried to expand for air, air that had been knocked out of her lungs. Toby looked down at her, almost pitifully, he stood above her as she lay on her side, clutching her ribs and gasping. With the toe of his boot, he reached out and turned her on her back by pressing down on her shoulder.

She met his eyes and tried to plead with him but whatever sense of mercy she thought she saw before vanished as pain exploded throughout the entirety of her left side. The steel-toe of his boot with the force of his kick was more than enough to fracture or even break several of her hollow ribs. Her vision spotted and turned and she cried out this time but the only noise she could make was a whispered scream.

He turned around and left her lying on the floor. Faintly, she heard a door slamming in the distance. She tried to crawl to the door, blood trickling from her mouth onto the cheap flooring. She tried to call out for help but no sound would come out. She reached the door but when she tried to use the last of her strength to reach up and swing it open, the pain was too great and she collapsed lifelessly to the floor.