Falling For You (bxb)

11. Rampage

5.16.20

Alex's POV

After a long night of questioning whether or not I'm actually ready to become a parent, I was currently pacing up and down the hallways. Ash had left early in the morning to have a talk with Marcus's coven about conjoining, and I was left to be anxious on my own. What if I ended up hurting the kid? What if I turned out like my father?

Back and forth, back and forth, back and forth until my head felt like it would expload. What if the child tore apart my relationship with Ash? Back and forth. What would I do if my father never accepted me? Back and forth. My chest had become infinitely heavier, and my posture was curled down from the weight on my shoulders. It's slowly getting harder to breathe, and I was pulling at my hair so hard it was strange that it didn't come out. My footsteps were the only sound I could hear other than my faint heartbeat... The heartbeat that was only halfway there because of Ash's blood in my veins. The exact blood that made me hurt my own brother and would one day make me hurt my child. Back and forth. I panted roughly from all of the thoughts flowing through my head, and my legs were beginning to get weak from the lack of oxygen and the constant exercise even though my bump was growing.

I had already worked myself into hysterics, so when someone hesitantly touched my shoulder, I lashed out immediately. "Leave me alone!" I snapped before resuming my pacing. Even though my eyes were open, I wasn't perceiving the world around me at all. Just because my ears were open didn't mean that I could hear anything over the roaring of the blood rushing through my head. Blood... I need it. I crave the red liquid deep in the pit of my stomach.

When my fangs slid out at the thought, I wasn't even alarmed. All I know is that I need a drink right this very second. This time when I reached the end of the hallway, I continued walking until I was out in the fresh outside air. I stalked through the leaves looking for anything to sink my aching teeth into, but in the back of my mind I knew this was wrong. I shoved the sensation down before continuing my search through the weeds.

Just when I was getting desperate, a tiny rabbit appeared in my vision. The little animal was young, innocent, and utterly perfect to satisfy my needs. I surged out of the bushes before immediately sinking my fangs deeply into the white rabbit's flesh. As soon as the blood touched the tip of my tongue, I moaned at the sweet taste. Once I was done with the now dead animal, I threw the carcass aside with a flick of my head, and I slid through the underbrush to find another source of blood.

Suddenly, a force hit me from the side which caused me to fall over. I rolled so that I was crouching before releasing a threatening hiss at whoever had just run into me.

My vision was blurry enough that I couldn't make anything out of this stranger other than enemy. No one stops me from getting what I need for my child!

When the figure lunged at me again, I leapt at the same time and clashed into it in midair. I was hardly in control of my body while it spun around in the battle to take care of itself, but I was soon pressed against the forest floor. Even though I was outmatched, I still attempted to surge out from underneath the figure multiple times.

"Snap... It... On... Alex!" a voice shouted from above me, but I couldn't make our anything the person was trying to tell me. Instead, I continued fighting against the weight above me until a pair of lips pressed against mine. My body melted against my commands, and I slowly came down from my high to find Ash on top of me putting pressure on my arms and legs.

"What the hell was that?" I grumbled when his lips separated from mine.

"I don't know what started it, but you went on a rampage to find blood for the baby. All I know is that I got a call from Ally saying that you had run out of the pack house in hysterics with your fangs hanging out. Now I'm going to drag you with me back to South Carolina so that I can keep an eye on you and you can take blood from the coven."

"I'm sorry, I wasn't trying to–"

"It's okay. We've all done it, at least you didn't hurt anyone except for maybe yourself and that rabbit. Are you hurt?"

"I don't think so. Did I hurt you?"

"Nope."

As soon as he stood up, I was pulled up after him until I hit into his body. Instead of pulling back right away, I lingered against his slightly shorter body. Just breathing his scent in and out was slowly grounding me onto the earth once more, and I felt a lot better in his presence. Ash completes me whether or not I like it.

***

"What's the worst that can happen?"

"Oh, I don't know, Ash, he'll cast me out again!" I shot back. We were both stood outside of my father's bedroom, and the only thing that kept me from spiraling out of control once more was Ash's arms wrapped tightly around my waist.

I sighed before pushing the door open to find the room... Empty? "Papa?" I whispered into the still air. My sights caught on a tiny slip of paper, and I walked over to the note with tears already brewing in my eyes.

Alex,

I apologise if this hurts you, but I can assure you that you will get over it. I am leaving to give you a better life and to find myself. Before you assume that this is your fault, know that I'm leaving for myself. I refuse to let myself hurt you any more than I already have. I want you to have a chance at life without me bringing you down, so please do not follow me. Just know that I accept you for the decisions that you've made, and I hope to meet you in the afterlife one day.

Love, Papa

I looked down at the little note that was now splattered with my tears. I knew it! I knew that I was slowly tearing apart all of my relationships at the seam! "Shhhh, it'll be okay, baby," Ash cooed into my ear, and I leaned back against him even harder than I had before.

"I need to go after him," I resolved while pulling from Ash's grip.

"No, you don't. We don't know where he had gone; it could be dangerous!"

"I can't just leave him out there!"

"I forbid you to go after him."

"Fine." Oh, Ashton... If only it was that simple to stop me.