Betray Me Softly

14: The Candle Light Effect

-Betray Me Softly-

Kivanc

There were sparkles shining in the sky...emotions linger in the environment. Staring up at the bright stars, Kivanc sat quiet and lost. The streets were roaring with liveliness and the smell of burning trash, but all he could think about were the sudden quiet rather depressing emotions settled in his heart. 

He had one hand folded behind his head as he laid on a net hammock (more like a blanket) that was hanging from the rope he would use for drying his clothes. During warm days...torturous mosquitoes looming in the air, he would bring out this hammock to cool down under the open sky...sleep on the balcony. Today, he just felt like lying on this hammock...peering at the sky. 

Saira, the daughter of the fruit-shop owner, had just messaged him...penned down a poem for him. Usually, he would simply smirk and enjoy having girls desperately try to fight for his heart...but not today. 

At this moment, there was just a lingering silence echoing in his head.

He would twist and roll...run his hand across his face in frustration and then just stare at the open sky. The stars felt like having a different meaning now...reminding him of that strange girl who was just not leaving his mind. The thought of her...the way she had so sweetly grabbed on to her little princess...it had shifted his heart in a weird way...made it smile so softly and sadly. 

Somehow, today, he was reminded of that rich brat whom he had allowed his teenage-phase to obsess over. She was spoiled and the only daughter of a local industrialist. He used to hang around near her house...leave so many gifts for her on her house's porch. She had once called him to punish some men for her father, and he had immediately cracked his knuckles in preparation. Yet, it was later that he realized that the girl was just taking advantage of his emotions. 

After getting engaged to some rich TUMS graduate, she had her brothers beat him up...and despite him easily being able to destroy those weak boys, he had resisted. It was his first attempt at trying to enjoy a normal life. He had been going through a severely rebellious phase, where he didn't even want to be the heir of the Mafia...and that desperation had been clawing for chances to force himself to feel emotions that now seemed like just a small form of infatuation. He had been a fool. 

His dark mafia heritage...that wasn't something he could deny. No matter how much he wanted to. Thus, after that little crushing disappointment, he had fully taken on his role of being prepared as the next big leader. He couldn't afford emotions and weaknesses when his world echoed with so much darkness and deadly vibes. Though, he did take moments away from the Mafia world by living in a shabby flat and having his aunt allow him to enjoy normal moments with their family...there was no denying his responsibilities...his heritage anymore. 

He was, indeed, the next Mafia leader in line. 

Sighing, he then closed his eyes...pain rolling in his heart again. The tender emotions annoyed him...the irritation of feeling annoyed him. There was so much chaos...so much suffocation upon not being able to untangle the emotions breathing in his heart.  He couldn't pinpoint what exactly these feelings were...what was he feeling. Lina...he was in his mind so persistently...so confusingly. What was he feeling? He wasn't exactly sure...

He picked up his phone again to distract himself, yet his frustration only grew as he reread the first line of the poem sent to him. 

'In my thoughts...you seem like a hero'

*Delete*

****

Lina

Dania, Alizeh, Hania...I felt like I had started bonding with these girls. After meeting my little Feri, I felt like Dania had turned softer towards me...less harsh. Marina couldn't stop gushing over my baby. The love my daughter was receiving warmed my heart so much. My baby...she needed this.