Guardian (RamKing)

Chapter Seventeen

(Author's note: Just a warning, this chapter is going to be kind of upsetting. There's not going to be as much sweetness as usual. Abuse is also going to be discussed. I tried to keep it as light as possible, but this is a heavy topic. Hope you guys are staying healthy!)

King and Ram were lying on the blanket, just watching the clouds as the sun shone down on them. The basket was half-empty, the two having eaten a lot of the food. There was a comfortable silencing surrounding them, only the faint twittering of birds and the buzzing of nearby bees could be heard.

Ram was enjoying just relaxing with his boyfriend, his eyelids getting a little heavy, when King's question brought him back to wide awake.

"What happened between you and Matt?"

Ram felt a little rush of panic, expecting to be overwhelmed by past emotions. The dark memories came, but, to Ram's surprise, he remained relatively calm. His heart rate was steady, his breathing even, and there was not a single tremble in his body. There was still an undercurrent of fear, but it was weak and the longer he focused on King, the more it faded.

"Do you want to talk about it?" King asked, not to push Ram, but to give him the opportunity to say no as he was not saying anything.

Did Ram want to tell King? He did. There was a faint feeling of shame, but Ram shoved it away. He knew King would never judge him. However, Ram wasn't sure this was the right time to talk about it; he didn't want to wreck their peace in the beautiful garden.

"Are you sure you want me to talk about it now? I don't want to ruin your time here," Ram replied, sighing a little.

King shifted to his side onto his elbow and propped his head up on his hand, looking down at Ram's face. Then he leaned down, in what was fast becoming his signature move, and nuzzled his nose against Ram's.

"You could never ruin this," King whispered, pecking Ram's nose before placing his head back into his hand.

Ram scanned King's face and found only genuine affection and happiness. His boyfriend was there to support him, to listen and provide comfort. It warmed his heart. He only hoped that this story wasn't going to upset King.

Taking a deep breath, Ram nodded, "Alright."

King watched as Ram's expression became blank, feeling nervous at the sight. Only when King noticed the determination burning in Ram's eyes did he relax a little. It seemed Ram wanted to talk about this and didn't feel forced to. Knowing how emotional, more specifically fearful, Matt made Ram, King reached out with his free hand and took one of Ram's hands in his, trying to provide as much support as he could.

"Well, Matt and I met when we were both training at the same boxing gym. He was very good, better than me, so I looked up to him," Ram murmured, his eyes closed and a faint blush on his cheeks.

King gave Ram's hand a squeeze to encourage him to continue.

"After a while, I started having feelings for him. He told me after one of his matches that he knew I had feelings for him. I was so worried that I had ruined our friendship, but he told me that he was okay with trying to date me."

King frowned at that wording. 'Okay with trying' to date Ram? How could someone hold himself back like that? If he wanted to date someone, he should say so, not say something like that. King found it offensive. It sounded almost as if Matt was just agreeing because he felt pity for Ram. His hatred for Matt grew, he could imagine it as a black twisting orb slowly growing in size in his head.

"He started to become more affectionate with me, but he was also quickly annoyed when I did something he did not like. Eventually, I learned not to do anything unless he told me to do it, j-just... just to avoid being punched."

"He hit you?" King's tone was low and dark, his fury barely contained.

Ram opened his eyes to look up at King, gently rubbing King's hand. King's rage was clear to Ram. He appreciated King being angry on his behalf, but he also hoped King would calm down. The story wasn't over yet.

Swallowing, Ram nodded, continuing, "We were both boxers, so I didn't think it was anything odd. In the beginning, it was barely a tap, but it got stronger the longer we dated. It still didn't hurt much though, I mean, I'm used to boxing."

King disliked all of that, especially that small self-deprecating smile on Ram's face.

"But you weren't boxing."

Ram flinched, shifting away. Guilt hit King immediately when he realised he had made Ram feel ashamed. In an instant, King was pulling Ram into his arms.

"Hey, hey, come here. I was pissed at Matt. I didn't mean anything else by it, okay?" King rushed out, holding Ram tightly before glancing down into Ram's eyes to check on him.

"Okay," Ram murmured, relaxing into King's hold as King gently stroked Ram's back.

"I really hate Matt," King muttered, "If I see him again..."

King trailed off, not entirely sure what he would do if he saw Matt again. There were so many ideas in his head, each one more violent than the last.

"King, calm down, my love. I'm fine," Ram comforted King, trying to get him to settle down a bit.

Once King refocused onto him, Ram carried on with the story, "I was chosen as the gym's contestant in a relatively important competition and Matt was the alternate. The day before the competition he asked me to pull out so he could fight instead of me. I thought this request was too far, and I... said no."

King felt nauseous. This was going to be bad; he could tell. He didn't want to ever think of his Ram in pain, but he needed to be there for Ram. If Ram needed to talk about this, then King would listen.

"That night he asked me to meet him behind the gym. He told me he wanted to apologise. Instead, he and his friends jumped me, beat me. They were all trained fighters, and many were older and stronger. There wasn't much I could do..."

King finally understood why Ram would freeze in Matt's presence. Not only was the man abusive, but he had betrayed his boyfriend and hurt him in such a cruel and brutal way. The memory of that night must be terrifying.

"He did it so I would have to drop out of the competition. There was no way I could fight in that condition," Ram muttered, anger in his voice, a few tears escaping, "I left the gym and went to another and cut off all ties with Matt. I never expected to see him again."

"That bastard. I want to kill him," King gritted out, his body tense, but then he looked down into Ram's worried and upset eyes.

With a sigh, King forced himself to settle into the embrace. Ram needed comfort more than anger right now.

"Are you okay?" King asked Ram, gently pulling Ram's face up so he could look into his eyes.

"Actually, yeah," Ram let out a breathy laugh, "I feel like I've been... released or something."

King smiled and pecked Ram's lips before murmuring, "I'm glad. You can always talk to me."

They settled back into silence for a while, just revelling in the feeling of being in the other's arms.

"Is there anything you want me to do?" King asked, sliding his fingers through Ram's hair.

"No, just let me be here with you a while longer."

King laid back a little, tugging Ram onto his chest, so that Ram would have somewhere more comfortable to rest his head.

"I love you, Ram."

Ram jerked his head up to look at King and found love shining in those gentle eyes. Relief flooded through him as he realised the way King saw him hadn't changed. Of course, it didn't. His King was caring and understanding.

"Ram? I just want to say one thing," King paused to make sure Ram was okay, "You know none of the stuff with Matt was your fault, right? All of that is on Matt."

Ram felt those words like a punch in the chest, but not in an unpleasant way. It was decidedly satisfying. His eyes had immediately filled with tears, but these were no longer sad or angry, they were happy tears. It was like a revelation. Not until King had said it had Ram truly believed that it wasn't, at least partly, his fault. He felt free.

"Thank you, my King. I needed that."