𝐃𝐀𝐃𝐃𝐘 𝐈𝐒𝐒𝐔𝐄𝐒 | jj maybank

𝐟𝐨𝐮𝐫

CHAPTER FOUR: MY APOLOGIES, PRINCESS

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i woke up the following morning, not initially remembering what went down. it wasn't until i noticed the mop of blonde hair that belonged to the boy holding me that i remembered everything that happened the previous night. never in my life did i suffer an episode that bad. maybe medication or therapy was a logical answer, but that is the opposite of what i'd ever do.

"hi," i heard jj's voice in my ear.

"hey," i rubbed my eyes, "i don't even know how to apologize for everything. you were looking out for john b, and the only way to get through to topper is what you did," i sputtered.

"hey, hey, hey, baby. shhhh," jj put his finger over my mouth gently.

"what did it look like last night, the episode? i was so incoherent, and i just remember you carrying me home. and it wasn't because i was drunk," i chuckled, thinking of all the times jj would look out for me when i got trashed, which was quite often.

"elsie, it was scary. it was like, you were there and conscious right? but i couldn't get through to you. nobody could," jj opened up to me, "i've never seen you like that, and to know i caused it just made me feel like shit."

"how about we both just forget it happened all together?" i asked seriously.

"i will, but the other pogues might not," jj stated, "on another note, why don't we keep this on the down-low for a bit?"

"that's shocking," i said a bit bitterly. he always was so daring, but he didn't want to admit to the other pogues that there was a spark between the two of us.

"let's just allow things to settle down a bit. when they do, we can accompany one another to midsummers," he hesitated, seeming like he was serious at the beginning, but he was kidding about the stupid kook party.

"jj, you know i'd do anything if it meant not going with kie to midsummers for another year in a row," i rolled my eyes just thinking about that goddamn kook event i somehow always got dragged into.

"does that include fucking me?" jj blurted, unable to hold the thought back. back to his normal self, thank god. it wasn't like jj to be all sensitive with me. maybe that's what it's like having a thing with him?

"jj-" i started.

"my apologies angel," he rubbed his forehead, "it's just challenging keeping it in my pants when you look like, that hot."

"you don't have to try and talk up my body every five seconds, dude," i got out of my bed and began to gather some things together to head over to john b's.

"it baffles me that you think i'm screwing with you. damn," he sat up, and his eyes followed my every move, like there was a magnet connecting the two.

"let's get ready to go to john b's," i ignored what he said entirely.

"whatever the lady wants," jj raised his hands in defeat, realizing that i turned my vulnerable switch off. back to normal elsie. the insensitive one that's tough, drinks, and smokes. mentally, i made a note to never go back to emotional elsie. i came to the conclusion that the entire scenario happened due to the fact that i was sober; alcohol and drugs save everything. i wasn't going to admit that to anybody though.

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"we're here," i announced gleefully, seeing the fellow three pogues doing not much of anything.

"elsie..." kie began.

"shh, shh, shh. i'm allll good. sober elsie equals sad. you'll never see that bitch again," i fabricated an entire lie.