One and Only (Kelly Severide love story)

Lift Each Other

"MAYBE WON'T YOU TAKE IT BACK, SAY YOU WERE TRYNA MAKE ME LAUGH AND NOTHING HAS TO CHANGE TODAY, YOU DIDN'T MEAN TO SAY I LOVE YOU"

It has been days since that night, it has also been days since I have spoken to Kelly. He tries knocking on my door to talk to me but I can't open it. I don't think I will ever be able to look him in the eye.

The only time I have seen him is when I peek out my window. Watched as he gets into his car and drives to the firehouse. 

I still find myself drooling over the way his shirt sticks to his towering physique, reminding me of all the areas I gripped and tugged on. I keep imagining the scratches down his back from where I dug my nails in as he pleasured me.

Every last part of him from his hair that I played with, to his neck which I sucked on, to his ears where I moaned his name all night long. 

How do I get over that? 

I can't even face him so I have had to call Boden to tell him that I can't come to shift, making up some lie about being ill, when the only thing I am is sickly in love with Kelly Severide. 

How am I going to marry Jesse after I just cheated on him?

I remember how heartbroken I was when Jesse cheated on me, it was a whole different type of kick in the chest and now I did the exact same thing. I used to think that maybe I was a better person than Jesse which is why he cherished me.

But now I am no longer a better person.

Stepping into yet another shower, trying to wash away his hands on me, his lips on my neck and his hot breath blowing over me from when he rasped my name. 

Scrubbing and scrubbing till my skin comes off but nothing can wash it away.

I still have the taste of him in my mouth; I find myself licking my lips to savour every last drop. My lips still feel the sting from where he bit and pulled. 

Just the memory of it has me pulsing.

Feeling as though I am still on a high, my body light and serene, shivering as his phantom touch etches me. 

The worst part is there is no one that I can speak to about this because it will only make them want to stop my marriage to Jesse even more which can't happen. I am marrying Jesse, I made a promise and I need to stick by it. 

No matter how much my heartaches.

The question is how to handle this and there is only one person I know who knows how to handle getting in trouble because of a passion-filled rendezvous.

Grabbing my stuff, I jump into my car and drive to Nina's.

I know she needs her space right now but I need her more.

"Olivia?" Nina opens the door, "I don't think that Jess is quite ready yet" she says, "can she come and tell me that to my face?" I request. Nina sighs, not wanting to get in the middle of it so she goes to get Jess.

"You heard Nina, I am not ready yet" Jess walks up.

"Okay Jess, I have given you your space," she notices my desperation, "but I need you to be my best friend right now" I plead. "I messed up really badly and I don't know what to do" tears start to brim my eyes, "I can't help you with Jesse" she sighs.

"Don't help Jesse, help me" I plead.

"Fine, what do you need?" She is still slightly hostile.

"Let's go somewhere" I suggest, "like Gigi's cafe" I add, "I will get you every flavour of cake pop they have" I state.