FOURTEEN

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I stayed home all day taking a mental break day away from rafe. John wouldn't be home for another 2 hours.  I laid on the couch mattress and blew out a smoke ring.
I shook my head looking at the baggy on the table. I sighed and grabbed the baggy, caving in and laying out a line.

I went down on it when the door swung open and I froze. "Emily." My brother stated. And I sniffed grabbing the baggy and putting it in my pocket. I turned towards my brother who looked at my like I was a ticking time bomb.

"Emily what are you doing to yourself?" He asked sitting next to me, putting my cigarette on the ash tray. He grabbed the baggy out my pocket and looked at it.

"Rafe told me to come check on you." He mumbled putting the baggy in his own pocket.

"Just give me it back bubba." I wined reaching for the bag. "Emily do you here your self?" He said angrily.

"I-I need it John. Please." My leg was shaking uncontrollably and I started at my brother.

"Emily you need help." He looked at my sadly. I shook my head "John they'll- they'll claim me unfit to be your guardian. You'll go to foster care."

"Listen Emily. Your going to take a break. From both jobs and your going to stay with me okay?" He said ans I shook my head. "I need to work."

"Right now you need to focus on recovering."

I broke down and cried in John b shoulder. He hugged me tight and I sobbed into his shirt. "I'm sorry John. I'm so sorry."

"I got you em, it's okay." He said rubbing my back. "You could have came to me if you we're struggling." He said pulling away. I almsot scoffed at the boy. "I shouldn't have to come to my little brother because I can't handle being mom anymore. That I miss dad. That is addicted to coke. I shouldn't need to come to you for that."

"Thank you. For taking care of me." He said and I smiled at the boy. "But now it's my turn to take care of you."

~

I pulled out my phone and called rafe.

"Hello?"

"Hey rafe. I-I'm Sorry. I'm getting better, John b is going to help me so I won't be at your house for awhile."

"Im glad."

"Come visit me if you can one day."

"Of course I will."

"Bye rafe."

"Bye love."

I sighed and hung up, looking at John b who smiled at me. "You'll be okay. I got you."

~

The next week was hard. I need the break mentally so I could worry about my self rather than my kid brother or the Cameron's. It was hard. I hadn't been doing coke long, but not having it was hitting me.

Some days I just shook staring at the wall on the floor, other days I just cried wondering when this feeling was going to stop.

John b kept telling me I was doing great but I didn't feel great. I felt like crap for having my brother watch out for me when I needed to do that for him.

Maybe I needed to take a break completely from being mom and dad and jsut focuse on being sister.

Rafe even stopped by a few times. He looked like crap too.
He said he was trying to stop like me, so I wasn't going threw it alone. He said he wasn't planning on going anywhere anytime soon and didn't want his habits to come back and hurt me.

He was trying.

And that's all I could ever ask from him.

~

"Jj!" I yelled smiling and hugging him. "I missed you em." He said smiling. "I know! I felt like I was gone for like ever." I laughed.

"Celebration kegger?" He asked smiling at me and John.

"Your going to celebrate my sobriety with alcohol?" I asked. "I'm in." John b looked down at me warningly. "What? I gave up coke not alcohol." He rolled his eyes at my and rubbed his face

"fine."

~

"Beer is so good when you haven't had it in weeks." I mumbled to kei taking a long drink.

"But your doing all right?" She asked me. I sighed and nodded "great actually. I don't know why I let all my stress lead me down there."

"What were you so stressed over?" She asked. I shrugged "dad, John b, work, myself. Everything really." I said taking a sip of my beer.

"Hey ima get a refill I'll be back." I said walking down the beach, excusing my self around torrist and other people.

As I filled my cup a arm rapped around my waist.

It seemed like everytime I was in my own head space, this arm came and rapped around me, making me fal even more in love.

Chapter 15 will be out tomorrow.

In the meantime leave suggestions on my Outerbanks Imagine books and I'll write them for you :)

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