ᴅᴇᴇᴘᴇʀ

19

Everybody's at war
with different things
I'm at war with
my own heart sometimes.

--

Horrible.

Arrantly, Horrible.

Was how Chimdi felt as she watched her classmates scramble out of the almost empty classroom.

She watched as the class gradually became empty, and she sat down, getting ready to sort out her tangled web of a brain.

Two days.

Two days of feeling every shade of horrible and restless. She didn't mean them.

All the harsh words she threw at TJ, all the venom laced words. But she couldn't fathom why she suddenly got pissed.

The feelings were all beyond her.

The rage too. It just came, like a bright trail in a tunnel so dark. It served as an escape route, and she took it.

Anything to rid her of the myriads of emotion.

Anything to get her away from him.

Nonetheless, she found herself longing for his presence. The terrible two days had made her wish to take back her words. For he heeded to her words and avoided her.

She felt like, even the smallest amount of happiness had been sucked out of her, for restlessness made her mind its new abode.

Quietly but quickly, she packed her learning materials into her backpack. Her blazer suddenly suffocating her, she pulled it off and stuffed it inside her backpack.

Letting out a sigh, she dumped herself on the hard surface of a nearby desk, wincing lightly at the slightly painful contact the desk made with her butt.

'What to do now...' She mused, pondering on her next action. Her heart said a thing, and her mind did another.

She thought of TJ, he didn't seem that happy after lectures were over. And again, guilt gnawed at her heart.

Could it be that I'm...

'Bitch please',  her subconscious mind threw back. 'You ain't that Important'.

Chimdi deliberated on ditching lunch, she'd lost appetite after hearing TJ's heart  breaking speech. Though she'd read every page of the voluminous novel, he'd given a new meaning to the book.

Just who is this boy?

She so wanted to find out herself.

Whether it was sheer benevolence, curiosity or just utter guilt, she found herself making up her mind to go search for TJ.

Hoisting off the desk, she flung her backpack on her shoulder, a quick glance at her black shoes confirmed that they were still dust free.

The harmattan was on it's one week vacation. For the past few days, the dust-bearing land wind had taken a break. But they knew otherwise to enjoy while it lasted.

She made her way to the front, avoiding clustered chairs which were put in that position, courtesy of her rough, hungry classmates.

"Hey, are you coming or what?" She stopped, heart in stomach, as she stared at her tired looking best friend.

"You scared me!" She almost screamed.

"I am well aware."

She glared at him. "Aren't you meant to be inside the dining right now?"