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It had been two weeks since Holland was released from the hospital and yet everything in her world still seemed askew.

Things with Lexi were awkward. It wasn't that Holland didn't believe her, it was just that now everything she did and said around Lexi she felt the need to filter, which wasn't an ideal situation when she really needed someone to talk about her relationship with Calum.

He'd been in Australia almost two weeks and in that time she had finally admitted to herself that she wasn't over him, she couldn't be. Knowing that her coach had released his ban on their relationship allowed her to study her feelings without the guilt of disobeying him weighing on her. She knew if she was honest with herself she was completely in love with Calum. Her feelings weren't a light switch and she couldn't just turn them off and they hadn't dissipated with the ending of their relationship.

They'd been talking. He had FaceTimed her as soon as he had arrived in Australia and nearly every night since. She didn't know what they were doing or how it would translate when he was back in Los Angeles and her competition season began but she didn't really care. She craved his presence in her life and she wasn't going to push him away when they both so obviously needed each other.

She couldn't afford to worry herself about her —maybe mending— relationship with Calum, her first competition was looming, as were the National Team and Olympic Team tryouts. Her parents had fought her on her decision to comeback to gymnastics so quickly but ultimately that choice was something that rested solely with Holland and she couldn't possibly hope to find her normal without gymnastics.

The gym was her life and she wasn't going to walk away from her dreams when she was so close to them that she could already taste the sweet flavor of success.

She felt prepared. After all she'd been on the National team multiple years and she knew what to expect. It was the part that came after that that terrified her. Her fear of blowing it in front of the Olympic committee again was crippling but she still had time before she needed to fully address that.

She dropped her gym bag on the floor and slipped out of her warm ups, walking to the mat and beginning to stretch out for her practice. It was nice being in her old gym, the one her parents had moved from New York to let her train at. The familiar navy walls and white washed tile made her feel at home and she found it easier to focus in the gym that she had once frequented more than her parents home.

Her stomach churned, her parents had her under constant supervision to make sure that she was eating as she was supposed to and once she returned to school her meals would remain supervised for the duration of the school year. It wasn't ideal but if that was what it took for her to be allowed to compete she'd take it. She couldn't even feign the thought of having to watch another Olympic games from her couch.

"Hi, Holland." A voice called from the door and she turned to identify who it belonged to.

"Coach Mack!" She squealed, rising to her feet and rushing over to her former coach, her arms spread wide for a hug.

Coach Mack was a gray haired man in his late fifties. He'd been an Olympic silver medalist in his prime before devoting his life to giving kids like Holland their own shot at Olympic glory. He was the entire reason she was recruited to UCLA and had the skills to be considered a contender for the US Olympic team to begin with.

"Glad to see you putting that key I gave you to good use."

"Of course! Thanks for that by the way, I've been in every day, just trying to get my strength back up before the season starts."

"I'm sure you'll be fine. You've always been so diligent in the gym, Holls."

"I've had a few setback recently."

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