My Idol

4

It's been a week of promoting but here.

I'm on the M Countdown performing my debut. And we have a host here. The performers are my seniors and some are new like me. I just can't think and look at them amaze. I'm here thinking to just focus. Some idols are looking at me. But I just bow at them and greet.

"You're the new solo artist? Nice to meet you. Your clothes are so cool. I watched your mv's and they are cool and catchy. Don't be nervous and be strong.", I assume this is Sowon the leader of GFRIEND!

I was stunned at their beauty. They are looking at me.

"Thank you, seniors! Same as your group. Nice to meet you.", I said and bow.

"JM! Get ready. It's your turn. Oh, hello Gfriend.", Manager Joe said and he bow. And they bow too.

"Thank you again senior Sowon.", I said and bow.

"It's ok JM? Nice to meet you.", she said and I smile.

"Come on let's go it will start in a second.", Manager said. I bow at them again and we left.

While the host are talking, I'm here at the stage ready to dance. My hands are sweating~~

Then it started. Some cheers I heard. The lights are open and same as the sound. I rehearse this already and here I am. I sigh mentally and started singing and dancing. I have four back up dancers so it's ok.

I performed first the Time Stop and now is the Bring the pain.

At last, I finished it. I breath because of exhaustion.

"Good job.", Manager tap my back and I smile.

"Thank you.", I said and wipe my sweats.

"What do you think? I'll won my very first award?", I ask.

"For me yes. But your competing with seniors so it's just 50 50 chance you have.", he said truthfully. I go to my waiting area and they start to take video on me to be added to JM TV. Yes I have that.

I saw a food and eat it as the camera man taking a video on me. Well, I need to talk.

"I'm here on a waiting area. I just finish performing. It was exhausting but it's worth it.", I said and open the cup noodle, a big size.

"Performing on a stage is really hard for me. It's my first time thou and I just debut.", I slurp some and finish chewing.

"Oh yeah someone guided me to be strong and not to be nervous. It thanks me a lot. Anyways, I'm just sharing this but being solo artist is so lonely to me. But I have the managers and staffs around so I hope I can get along with them. Right Mr. Cameraman.", I said and smile at him. He nods with the camera.

"I hope you're not getting boring with me. Are you?", I ask but he signs a no. I thumbs up at him.

I finished my noodles and put it to the trash can. I go at the front of the mirror and check my clothes and my head.

"Can I take it off this scar?", I ask my manager.

He signs a no.

"No? Ok, it's cool though. Ooh, my make up is a mess.", I said and fix it. The camera is still videoing me.

All performers are here now in the stage to announce the winner. I stand still and looking innocent. I look at the tv screen in our front.

Well while the numbers are increasing, I pray mentally.

And it was like a slow motion.

The confetti are flying around. I was froze at my place and a boy group tap my back that brings me back.

"You won dude.", someone said. I look at the screen and I really won! I bow at them and my tears of joy are flowing. I can't believe it!~~I won!~

I bow at every Idol and smiling.

I sing the Bring the pain and fans? Are cheering me. I was so happy and wave at them and giving them heart.

And it's finish.

I'm here now for interview. What I mean is Pdnim is interviewing me for how was it. Well, I told him the truth. He even told me to host in just one day at a show. And next month I will have little concert outside to have their eyes on me. You know so that I will have a fan. I thank him for all. And I promise that I will work hard.

I'm turning 20 this August.

When manager knows that I'm still 19 he was shock because I look like 17 but no. Am I that young? Well, some said my face is still young.

I wear my mask and I told to my manager that I will go at the grocery but he said he will but I refuse. I told him that I can do it by myself.

Anyways it's night and less people are around and going at the grocery. I wear my cap too. My clothes are just normal.

Now when I step out to my dorm, I feel like I'm still a college and not an artist.

I felt the coldness and I thank myself that I wear a cloth that will warm me.

As I walk some people are looking at me. Am I that tall? No way.

I'll test if they will know me by removing my mask. At least my red hair will not be seen. There is no way that I'm famous and they will know me that quick.

As I remove, I just walk not looking at everybody's eyes.

I'm now here at a mini grocery.

I bought some noodles and others.

I'm now here on the cashier and looking at the cost. The sales lady said the cost and I paid it.

"E-excuse me sir.", I look at the lady.

"Are you the new artist?", she asks. I was shock. I pointed myself and looking around if she's talking to someone but none. The guy look at me too.

"Me?", I ask and she nods. I awkwardly smile and nod. They were shock too.

"Please don't say to someone else I beg you. If that's ok?", I ask.

"We understand sir. By the way your album was good. I'm a fan.", the girl said. I smile and bow at her.

"Thank you. That's a big help for me. I'm a little embarrassed thou.", I smile.

"Don't be embarrassed sir your good and your songs are catchy. It was cool thou.", the boy said. I smile again.

"Thanks for the support. I hope I can see you somewhere again.", I said. They smile too.

"Can we have an autograph?", the lady shyly asks.

"Of course, for a fan.", I said. They immediately gave me a jacket, their jacket to be exact because they don't have anything that I will sign. They gave me a marker and I signed it. My very first signature to a fan.

We thank to each other and we bow each other. I left there now and I wear my mask to be safe. I didn't know that some will recognize me.

But that's a relief and I'm happy to meet a fan that supports me.

It makes me fight and feel stronger.