chandler riggs and occasional Carl Grimes imagines

"I'll see you soon"

it's been two months since your love had gone. since you've felt his arms around your waist. since you've smelled his cologne. since you've looked in his beautiful blue eyes.

as you rolled out of bed unwillingly, you looked over to his side. it hasn't been slept in since he left. the blankets are practically still straight. his pillow unfluffed, you leaned over to smell it. a tiny part of you had the smallest shred of hope that his smell had yet to fade from the pillow. it had.

you walked into the bathroom and looked in the mirror. your eyes were swollen from the countless hours spent crying in the night. the dark circles surrounded your eyelids, showing the lack of sleep you've had.

you missed him. you wanted him. but, he was gone. like dust in the wind, never to be seen again. the love of your life slipped through your fingers without any warning.

you didn't know he was hurting. you always had a hunch, but he would never talk about it. why would he leave you so alone and helpless? without love, without joy, without anything but pure sorrow.

looking back at pictures, you see his smile. the smile he painted on to make sure you were happy. the laugh he faked to show that he was okay. but he wasn't.

you grabbed the note that he left you before he went. the one you've read a countless amount of times, wishing it could bring him back.

my beautiful princess, I'm sorry I'm now absent in your life, but I'm present in your memories. always remember that. I'm watching over you, babygirl. you are strong enough to fight the hate of the world. I wasn't. I couldn't handle the pain any longer. sleeping next to you, it helped. more than you know. you are my everything, y/n. you are beautiful, and you are strong. I know you're blaming yourself, and I don't want you to do that, because what I am about to do, is not under any circumstance your fault. you helped me even when you didn't know you were. I know I should've told you I have been hurting, but I was afraid of worrying you. tell my fans, my brother, my mom and dad, and all of my friends that they are not the reason for this, and I love them. I love you as well, baby.

if you're the one who found me, im so sorry, babygirl. this is not what I wanted for you. I wanted you to have a good life. I wanted you to be happy. and one day, you'll find a man who treats you better than I ever could. he'll treat you like the princess that you are. he'll love you. I wish I could say he'll love you more than I do, but that is physically impossible because you are such a beautiful, amazing girl, and I was so lucky to call you mine for the three years that I have.

never forget that I will always be watching over you, and I will always keep you safe. no matter what it takes.

I love you, babygirl.
   
                                            -chandler

chandlers pov

I've been watching over y/n since I left. I've watched her cry out for me. I've watched her collapse on the bathroom floor in tears because of what I did. I feel terrible. I wish I didn't hurt her the way I did. here lately, I wish I never even met her at all. if I hadn't, she wouldn't be feeling this pain right now. this is all my fault.

as I watched tears stream down her face while she read my note, I tried to hold her hand, but as usual, it didn't work. it never has. I've tried holding her while she cried, I've tried wiping her tears, I've tried kissing her forehead, nothing works. I'm gone, and she's still there, alone, without me.

"someone's gonna treat me better" she mumbled "that's bullshit" she added, walking back to the bathroom.

I followed after her. she got into the drawer and pulled out a razor.

"what are you doing?" I asked her, but shortly remembered she can't hear me.

she took the blade out and sat on the lid of the toilet.

"here goes it" she said, pressing the blade to her wrist and sliding it, drawing blood.

"stop" I said, trying to take the blade from her hand, but failed "stop!" I screamed

"I'm sorry" she whispered. she grabbed a note from her pocket and laid it on the sink. but it wasn't my note.

"what are you doing?" I asked. she cut again, but deeper "you can't do this!" I screamed, wishing she could hear me. as tears streamed down her face and she cried out in pain, I felt my eyes weld with my own tears, and they began to fall.

"I miss you too much, Chandler. we can be together now" she said, looking around, crying out as she continued to slide the blade across several areas of her soft, beautiful skin.

"I'm here, baby! I'm right here!" I sobbed as she laid on the ground, letting your wrists and legs bleed all over the tile of the bathroom.

her eyes closed and she whispered one last thing

"I'll see you soon"