To Be Alone With You

17. intoxicate me now

warning: very brief mention of suicide.

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CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

INTOXICATE ME NOW

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The music at the party was so loud that it made Kaspian's head pound, his chest thrumming along to the bass of the drums. The stench of sweat and beer as a combination wafted through the air, causing Kaspian to nearly choke in disgust as he recoiled at the smell.

As he moved through a sea of sweaty bodies, he finally found Phoenix, who was talking to someone on the phone.

Nodding at him as a method of greeting, Kaspian made his way towards the alcohol, and immediately downed three drinks.

Kaspian winced and turned around, bumping into Phoenix. "What the fuck kind of drinks are these?"

"I don't know," Phoenix hastily said, taking the cup out of Kaspian's hands. "How many have you had?"

Kaspian held up the number four, while saying, "Three." After realising what he'd done, he snorted. "Okay, that was a genuine mistake. I'm not drunk yet, I literally just started."

"And I'm not letting you get drunk."

"Hypocrite," Kaspian mumbled, grabbing another cup. "Okay, genuinely, what the fuck is this bitter ass shit? Is this what alcohol tastes like now?"

Phoenix took a cup of his own, tasting it and flinching at the taste. "Yeah, it just tastes really fucking bad because it's warm. Pretty fucking strong though."

Good. I don't want to remember anything about today. I don't want to think about my father or my grandmother or anyone else.

Kaspian was lost in his thoughts, when Phoenix sighed. "I can't stop you from drinking, but I'm going to watch you, okay? Just so that you don't end up at the hospital or something." He held out his hand, for Kaspian's phone, unlocking it and texting someone. "I texted your mom. Told her you're staying over at my place."

"Okay," Kaspian muttered, throwing back another drink.

Fuck this. Fuck it all.

—

It took just half an hour for Kaspian to get drunk.

Once he was drunk enough, he was socialising with people he'd never spoken to before, making jokes that Sober Kaspian definitely could not have come up with; and even though he hadn't exactly forgotten about the events that took place, they were shoved to the back of his mind, just how he liked it.

Just as Kaspian was going to get another drink, he was shoved into someone, nearly toppling over. Thin, strong arms steadied him, holding onto his body with a firm grip.

"Hey! Ro-wan? What're you doing here?" Kaspian slurred slightly, eyeing the cups on the table. He finally decided to just pour himself his own drink, spilling a little bit of it on the table. I'll clean up later.

Rowan's skin looked especially glowy in the faint yellow lights of the house, and Kaspian placed his hand on his cheek, letting out a content sigh. "So soft. And smooth. I love your skin."

Rowan exhaled out a small laugh. "Phoenix called me. And thank you, I washed it with some face scrub thing today. It had enriching properties, apparently."

Kaspian's eyes widened with a child-like enthusiasm. "Oh my god. Lemme fuckin' tell you about the face scrub I used yesterday, it was like, strawberry flavoured or some shit. Not flavoured flavoured, like, flavoured but for smell. Anyway. It had these lil' bead things in it, and it was hella cool. So texturey. It made my skin smell so nice. My skin didn't really feel all that nice, considering it was some fuckin' knock off brand that was jus' scammin' me to get their coin, but I smelled so good, I think it was worth it. Like, I was like, edible or something, I smelled that good. It was great."