It's Me, Again

Ch. 13 (Kate)

I walked home briskly with my eyes trained on the sidewalk in front of me. I didn't want to look at anyone. Even though no one would know what just happened, it felt like their eyes could see through me and they would all pity the poor girl who has amnesia, just saw her ex-boyfriend with another girl, and then fell down while trying to discreetly leave the bar.

When I get home Sarah isn't back yet so I quickly strip off the clothes I put on for my "night out", wash my face, put my hair up in a messy bun, and get into bed. I was supposed to text Dylan when I got home and I consider not, but I don't want him to bother me. At the same time, I kind of want him to sweat a little as a form of punishment. It makes no sense because we're not together, I have a boyfriend for god's sake, but I still feel the need to punish him for what just happened.

My phone rings and it's Dylan. I don't pick up and I wait a few minutes before I text him to let him know I'm home and going to bed. I put my phone down, stare at the ceiling, and let out a loud huff.

What is wrong with me? Why did I feel so jealous when I saw him smiling with that girl who was whispering in his ear? He shattered my heart and I shouldn't care about what he does and who he dates. And I have a boyfriend! Carter is a really good guy. It's not fair to him that I don't remember our relationship and that I'm spending so much time with my ex.

After over an hour of overthinking, I decide that I need to just put a little space between me and Dylan for a little while. I need to get my life together and give Carter a real shot. I'm with him for a reason and it's not going to help me in any way if I rely on Dylan too much.

****

The next day I decide to just stay in and work on school things. I still have a month before they're due, but I have nothing else to do right now so might as well get a head start. I'm in the process of making my breakfast when Sarah opens the apartment door. She had decided to stay in the city last night with her boyfriend. I didn't tell her about what happened when she texted me. I didn't want her to worry about me.

"Morning," I say as I scramble my eggs. "Want any breakfast?"

"Sure, thanks." Sarah goes to her room to change her clothes and comes out a few minutes later in grey sweatpants and a cozy white pullover.

"How was your night with Marcus?" I ask as I scoop my eggs onto a plate from the frying pan.

"It was really good. We went to a greek restaurant for dinner with some of his friends and then we went back to his apartment to watch movies," she says as she slides onto a stool.

"How was your night? Did you end up doing anything?"

I turn the fire off and bring our plates to the island.

"I actually decided to go out for a little while, but that ended up being a big mistake." I hand Sarah a fork.

As she grabs the fork she asks, "Why? Was it sensory overload? Did you feel sick?"

"No, I felt okay for the most part. Physically at least." I sigh, "Okay, so I felt like getting out so I got dressed and walked over to Tripp's Pub. Dylan told me he, Josh, and Mallory go there every Thursday night so I decided to go."

"Mhm, and..." she motions for me to go on with her scrambled egg filled fork.

"So I got there and I'm looking around for them and I spot them at a table in the back corner. And they weren't alone. Dylan was there with a girl that looked like his date. She was hanging on to him and whispering in his ear. He was smiling. It was just....not what I wanted to see."