It's Me, Again

Ch. 18 (Dylan)

Everything at dinner was going smoothly. Food and drinks were flowing, laughter and conversation nonstop. Then, another ghost from my past had to show up which created a really awkward situation at the table. Kate must've texted Sarah about what was going on because she requested the DJ play "Love Me Less". That or she's secretly here and spying on us, which I wouldn't put past her. If only Kate knew how the lyrics to this song are going to connect with what I have to tell her.

We decided not to get dessert at the pub since we were already way past our gift certificate amount and going out to grab dessert somewhere else would give Kate and me a destination to walk to.

After saying goodbye to Josh and Mallory and getting a supportive pat on the back from Josh, Kate and I head down the street to walk towards the riverfront.

"So where to?" Kate asks as she tucks her phone back in her purse.

"I thought we could just walk along the riverfront? There's an ice cream shop along the way so we can grab some dessert if you want and then just walk and talk."

"That sounds good."

The air between us changes from one of ease to charged with nerves. I'm so nervous to get it all out there and tell her the missing parts of our story. It was painful living through it the first time and now to have to relive it and see the pain that will inevitably be etched on Kate's face when she has to hear it is making me so anxious. The dread of it all is weighing on me like a ton of bricks. Suffocating and painful - I just want to get it over with, but I know it's going to hurt.

"Sorry about what happened back there," I point behind us with my thumb towards the pub.

"You've sure got a lot of exes everywhere," Kate says with amusement in her voice. She doesn't seem mad, but this isn't exactly something I'm proud of.

"They're not exes per se," I reply, which I realized immediately after the words left my mouth make me sound even worse.

"Oh, I see."

I am really not helping my case here. What I have to tell her is bad enough and now she thinks I'm some man-whore.

"I just mean that I didn't have actual relationships with them. We just hung out and a few date type things, but they're not exes."

"You don't have to justify it to me. We're not together and we weren't together when you hung out with these girls, so it's not really my business," she says looking up at me while we walk. "But, I won't lie, it's a little annoying to run into 2 of them in the past few weeks. Makes me wonder how many there are," she playfully elbows me.

I knew she saw Krista that night she fell at the pub, but I don't know if she caught her slip up and I'm not going to ask her about it.

"I just don't want you to think those girls are a part of my life or anything. I honestly have not seen them in years. It's like someone is playing a cruel joke on me that these girls would show up all of a sudden and both times when you were around."

"It's probably Sarah," she jokes.

"You know, I wouldn't put it past her," I laugh.

"Jokes aside, I think the world just works like that sometimes, ya know? Like that saying, 'When it rains, it pours.' Everything happens at once, and usually not things you want to happen," Kate philosophizes.

Well, when she hears what I have to tell her it's going to be a damn downpour.

"Yeah, you're right. It always seems to happen that way, doesn't it. There's the ice cream shop," I nod up ahead to the neon sign of an ice cream cone. "Want ice cream?"