prologue

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My chest is heavy. I can't breathe. What am I doing? The cars speed past but none stop, none stop for the figure leaning over the railing.

Light spitting of the rain falls down onto my bare arms. Just perfect. I lean my head forward, staring down into the dark abyss of the water. It splashes underneath me. My heart drops in my chest as my edge myself closer slowly. The rain falls down heavier, at this point I can't even tell the difference between the rain and my tears.

I take a final deep breath, my eyes closing and my entire body shaking with fear and nerves.

"Hey!" I hear a voice behind me say. I don't turn around to face them and I hear some heavy footsteps coming towards where I am. I secure myself against the railing as I lean against it.

"Are you okay?" The voice says again.

"Yeah. I'm fine. Don't worry." I mumble, watching the river underneath me swirl around.

"It doesn't look fine. You're hanging over the edge. Why don't you come back over here and we can talk?" They say.

I turn around slowly. My dark eyes are greeted by a familiar face- Josh Marsh. His curly dirty blonde hair is falling over his face, but his blue eyes are full of worry.

"Elyse, Elyse Carter? You're in my math class. What are you doing?" He rushes towards me, his hand on my shoulder to secure me closer to the railing.

"I'm fine." I mutter.

"Please just come back onto this side." He begs. I glance into murky blue eyes for a second; they seem genuine and full of worry. Slowly, I feel myself nod. His lips turn into a small smile.

I slowly move my legs over and he helps me, his hands on my back as he guides me to the closest bench. He sits next to me and stares at the floor.

"Do you wanna talk about it?" He whispers, barely audible.

"Not really." I say back, also staring at the floor awkwardly.

"Where you planning to... you know?"

I don't respond, my gaze turning away from him and the floor and instead watching the cars speed past.

"Elyse..." He says, his voice soft and shaking.

"Please don't worry about it. We don't know each other well enough for you to care." My voice comes out mockingly.

"But I do, how can I prove it?"

"Just leave it." I say, standing up and starting to walk away until his hand firmly grasps onto my wrist and pulls me back to him.

"Just give me a month. 31 days until the 20th June. Please Elyse. Everyday I'll give you a reason to live. I promise you I'll change your mind."

"1 month." I turn around to face him.

"You won't regret it." He smiles at me, that smile he's so popular for.

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