How Long Will I Love You?

Chapter 4 - Avoiding the Inevitable

     It was two days later and Laura couldn’t still accept the fact that she had actually fallen in love with Taylor, her best friend, and bigger problem on her part, a girl. She had no problems with lesbians or bisexuals. She was a big supporter of them. But not once had she ever thought that she was actually a part of that community. Growing up, she had always been one of the guys. She loved doing things guys normally did, and doing those things with men. But she loved them, too. She loved being in-love with them. Sure, she’s had so many girl crushes but that was it, plain crush. She thought she had always been straight and not anything other than that. So why was she feeling this now?

     Convinced that she was just being paranoid, she tried everything she could to ignore what she was feeling. So when Taylor invited her to a small fashion show that her friend had organized, she agreed to go with her. Even if every muscle and bone in her body felt excited just at the thought of seeing Taylor again, she kept trying to convince herself that it was not what she was feeling.

Taylor and she decided to just meet at the venue. Taylor was running a little late so Laura waited for her at the lobby so they could go in together. While waiting for her friend, she kept pacing back and forth because she was freaking out. She was hoping that after seeing her today, it would all be clear. She wasn’t in-love and it was stupid of her to even think about it. It was just a drunken moment.

     But then Taylor arrived and Laura felt her knees weaken because boy, was she so wrong. Because she didn’t look at Jodi this way, or Tasha, or Yael or any other women for that matter. The moment she saw her, she felt her heart do flip flops inside her chest then it started beating faster. Taylor smiled at her and it was the best smile in the world, like she could just stare at it all day.

     “Hi!” Taylor almost ran to her, then kissed her on the cheek. “I’m so sorry I’m late. I was reading this script my agent sent to me. It was so good I totally forgot about the time.”

     “Don’t worry about it, girl.”

     “So. Let’s go?” She held her arm and they started walking.

     When she held her, Laura felt as if electricity went through her veins. She was feeling things she’d never felt even with her former boyfriends and it was driving her insane. “Fuck,” she thought. “Get a grip of yourself, bitch.”

-o-o-o-

     The show had started when they arrived but there were two seats reserved for them in front that they had sat as soon as they got there. The beautiful dresses made by the designer took Laura’s mind off Taylor for a while. She’s always loved wearing simple clothing, shirts and baggy jeans were her thing. But she didn’t mind wearing the beautiful ones, too. She’s always dressed to impress whenever she had to, and she had always been successful at those.

     She didn’t know how it happened, but she just suddenly felt something warm and light at the back of her palm. She looked down at her hand and saw Taylor involuntarily doing it. She was leaning towards Laura while watching the show and her thumb was making light circles on Laura’s hand.

     The latter tried to ignore it. It was not unusual for Taylor to be this touchy. She did this to everyone and Laura shouldn’t freak out.

     But the minutes kept dragging as the only thing she was noticing was Taylor’s hand on hers and how it made her feel the exact same thing she was trying to avoid. So when she couldn’t take it any longer, she pulled her hand away then stood up.

     “Hey, everything okay?” asked Taylor, who was surprised by this.

     “Y-yeah, yeah, yeah. I just... Uh, I remembered that I gotta go do this thing that... Uh, I gotta go do something. I’m sorry, it slipped off my mind.” She realized she was stammering but she didn’t care. She had to get out of there. Fast.