Dear you,
Hello there, you may not know me and I might not know you but that doesn't mean I don't care. That doesn't mean there are people out there that don't care. Please don't give up now and live.
Don't give up because you say you're unwanted. I used to harm myself because I'm kind of an outcast in school. I couldn't fit in and I felt that people were using me. Nobody really wanted to know who I was... until a few years later, I transferred schools. My social anxiety nearly got worse because I was in a new school, but there I found people who were just like me. I learned I didn't care about the rest of the entire community because 2 people were all I need. If you think you're weird, then let you and your friends be weird together. If you feel like you're alone in this world, just wait, people will come to you and you will find them as well. The wait may be excruciatingly long, but it's all worth it once you find those people who'll stay by your side.
To find yourself and others quicker, there's still always time. There must be a million things you haven't done, and you must have another list of things you have done, don't cut that list short. Life is full of surprises, crossroads, traffic, and hindrances. Go and take that risk of trying something new. If you feel like a failure every time you do that, get back up and try again. Once you learned from your defeat, that doesn't mean you've lost. Never be afraid of making a mistake because that will lead us to confront and learn something new.
People may laugh, and I know that's really painful. Ignore them, that's what I learned. It's not like they perfected everything in one go. It's not like they ever made a mistake in their life. Who are they to say all those bad things when they don't know you? If people expect too much from you and they press you harder with pressure, stand up to them and speak your mind. You need to live. Sure, there would be things you can't do, there would be times when you fail, but tell them you're human.
If you say you don't know yourself, then reflect. What are the things you like and hate, what are the things that make you happy or sad? What are the lessons you've learned and the mistakes you've repeated? What are your goals, your aspirations? What is something you wish to see in the future? Take your time figuring things out, none of these realizations come in a snap. Don't bundle all of your hard feelings to yourself and express them. Write it out, cry, scream if you have to, just let it all out and you may find peace because you have recognized what's been bothering you.
Life is hard, sometimes, you don't know where you're going, but that doesn't mean you're the only one who's having a hard time. There are many people out there who feel like their stumbling blindly as they move forward with life, but that's the beauty of it.
You may have heard of the phrase "YOLO" or "you only live once", but in reality, you only die once. This was one of the biggest lessons I've learned so far. Yes, you only have one life, but every day we are given a chance to live and experience something new. No two days are exactly alike, there would be time to do things that are unfamiliar to you, there would be times to do things you would love to.
You have not lost your way, you may be stopped and the road ahead might be probably a little foggy. Don't single yourself out because failure helps us grow and find ourselves. You are not unwanted, there are still people out there who care. Just because they might be angry at you doesn't mean they hate you. If you're stuck in a problem, tell yourself you will get out of it, there is always the last day for everything.
Don't let your last day come around too fast, you still have time, there are so many things to do, so many people to meet, so many adventures to experience, so many emotions to feel. Remind yourself: you are your own unique self, you are human, and like everybody in this world, you deserve to live your life to the fullest.
- Love, B
