Teaching Noah | √

012

IT WAS ONE of those mornings when I felt really irritable, cranky, sour, and on edge. My tolerance was lower, and I was just more bothered by the little things I would look over on a normal day. It happened to the best of us. Simon always told me it would be super weird if our moods were stable everyday— it was just important to know what causes the moodiness, and that would help to minimize the moody days.

I knew what caused my irritation. There were mornings I woke up feeling frustrated and unhappy that I couldn’t be like everyone else— normal, and without a disorder. I would think of all the times I got a nasty reaction from people after ticking and I would become angry at the world.
I hated it, though. I had the tendency to push people away when I got like this. Snapping at River, turning a cold shoulder to Mom, and then, when I felt less irritable, I would awkwardly try to speak to them again.

I pushed myself off my bed and felt my knee jerk forward, causing me to stumble to the ground which was covered with a grey fluffy rug, thankfully.

“This is not it at all,” I groaned as I ran my fingers through my hair in frustration and watched absent-mindedly as my knees continued to act on its own accord.

I got up from the rug a minute later when I was certain my knee had stopped jerking, and I knew what I needed right now.

Fruit-infused water.

There was something about drinking water infused with fruits that relaxed me, and I knew the combinations all too well. Strawberries and basil in water relieved my stress and helped lift my mood. Blueberries and lime helped to flush away toxins. Apples and oranges helped to boost my energy. Dark cherries and mint helped me fall asleep easily.

So, fruits and water are really good for you, kids.

I trotted to the kitchen and opened up a cupboard, taking out one of my mason jars. For some weird reason, I loved mason jars and bought new ones every year. I couldn’t tell what I liked them exactly, maybe it was the straws. They were aesthetic. I peered into the refrigerator and took out a bottle of cold water, pouring some into the jar. Seeing there was no basil, I took some diced strawberries and grabbed a handful of blueberries, throwing them into the water. Feeling a little extra, I added a slice of lemon.

I sat on a high stool, taking a long sip before I let out a sigh,  but my attention was captured by Coco, who ran into the kitchen, making small sounds before running out. I furrowed my eyebrows, wondering what she was up to. Shortly, River walked into the kitchen, chuckling. “Where’d she go?”

“Coco?”

“Mhm,” he nodded, a smile on his face as he looked around the kitchen.

“I don’t know,” I mumbled. “She ran into the kitchen and then ran out. What happened?”

“She was lurking around my room, and I pretended to chase after her, but I ended up actually chasing after her.”

I chuckled lightly and took another sip of my water when River queried, “Are you good?” His gaze was set on me and I nodded, “I’m fine.”

“You lie terribly,” he leaned against the island table, unblinking.

“I’m just in one of those moods,” I shrugged.

His eyes went soft and he said after a while, “Don’t push me away this time. Don’t push any of us away.”

“I don’t mean to…” I countered softly.

“I know,” he nodded. “I know you can’t help but feel that way sometimes. I also know that being moody isn’t some treat for you, either, but what I want is just for you not to push me away when you feel like that,” his eyes bored into mine.