ii

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.•° ✿ °•.
𝙨𝙚𝙪𝙣𝙜𝙢𝙞𝙣
°•. ✿ .•°

────.•°•.〔✿〕 °•.•°────
but i watch your eyes, as she
walks by
what a sight for
sore eyes
brighter than a
blue sky
she's got you
mesmerized
while i die
────.•°•.〔✿〕 °•.•°────

seungmin woke up the next day to his older brother yelling into his ear.

"get up you rat! you're gonna be late to school!"

panic rose in seungmin's chest. he'd never been late. his eyes darted to the alarm clock on his nightstand. the red numbers glared brightly. he groaned and kicked his brother in the shin. it was only seven; he had at least an hour an a half before he had to walk to school.

"wonpil, get the fuck out of my room!" seungmin yelled.

his brother raised his arms in surrender, his face splitting into a wide grin. wonpil winced dramatically when seungmin threw a pillow at him. the younger closed his eyes.

"fine, fine, i'm leaving."

seungmin heard retreating footsteps and the door of his bedroom shut. he opened his eyes, rubbing his fatigue-ridden face with his hands.

the curtains billowed gently from the circulating ceiling fan. seungmin didn't know why he had it on, it was already cold enough without it. the sun streamed in through the windows and streaks of light danced around the room.

his desk was littered with papers and books, his chair inexplicably on the other side of the room. pictures were messily pinned on the wall above his desk. photos with his friends, pictures he'd taken on vacations with his family. on the adjacent wall, various posters were lazily taped across the entirety of the space. the colors clashed unpleasantly but seungmin didn't seem to mind.

a bookshelf filled with a multitude of genres sat to his right. the books struggled to fit within the crowded shelves. some were strewn carelessly on the ground.

seungmin rubbed the remainder of sleep out of his eyes and swung his legs over his bed to get ready for school.

— 〔✿〕 —

seungmin waddled down the staircase, struggling to pull hyunjin's sweater over his head. he'd washed it yesterday for the sole purpose of wearing it again today. his dad was a little peeved when seungmin refused to wash it with the rest of the laundry.

"hey honey, did you sleep well?" his mom asked from the kitchen.

"pretty good," he said, placing a piece of bread between his teeth. it swung back and forth as he set his backpack on the dining table. he took a bite and held the remainder in his hand.

"wait don't eat yet, i'm making pancakes!" his dad yelled by the stove. seungmin finished his bread.

seungmin was about to respond but wonpil called from the living room.

"yo min, hyunjin's here!"

he looked back at his dad. "sorry dude, but i've gotta go."

"don't call your father 'dude'!" was the last thing he'd heard before he rushed out the door with his backpack.

— 〔✿〕 —

their walk to school was prompt. the occasional small talk here and there, but the majority was filled with a comfortable silence. hyunjin admired the nature around them, but seungmin would admire hyunjin instead. they swung their arms in sync, holding hands with their fingers entwined .

the duo reached the school's entrance and hyunjin slipped his hand of seungmin's, the younger winced at the sudden loss of heat. he begrudgingly shoved his hands into the pockets of the coat he wore over his—hyunjin's sweater.

hyunjin stopped abruptly and seungmin slammed into his back. he groaned, ready to yell at the older but hyunjin's eyes were focused somewhere else.

seungmin frowned.

oh.

it's her.

she walked by the school courtyard. her face lit up as she spoke to her friends. seungmin glared at her, a seed of jealousy growing in his chest. he hated her. she was perfect, everything seungmin wanted to be and more. and to top it all off, hyunjin was absolutely mesmerized by her. by her beauty, her personality, her smile. he always talked about her smile. seungmin hated her smile.

her name was shin ryujin. she was a year below them, a junior. hyunjin had met her through a girl on his dance team, hwang yeji. they'd only talked for a couple of months but they quickly became smitten with each other. seungmin had known hyunjin for years but he'd never looked at the younger the same as he would look at her; eyes full of love and there was nothing platonic about it. it was only a matter of time before he asked her out. seungmin suddenly felt uncomfortable in hyunjin's sweater.

he slapped the back of the older's head.

"stop drooling, girls don't like that," seungmin said. there was a trace of bitterness in his voice. if hyunjin could tell, he didn't show it.

hyunjin blinked and looked back at the younger as if he'd just come out of a daze. he laughed.

"you're right."

seungmin rolled his eyes. " i'm always right."

he dragged the older into the school to find their friends, glancing over his shoulder.

why can't i be her?

— 〔✿〕 —

henlo i am gay for ryujin

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