99 letters after /Jeon Jungkook ff

Emptiness

I opened my house door to be greeted by a wave of cold and loneliness. I was all alone, in my apartment, and it wasn't the best feeling after just having an argument with your boyfriend.

I sloppily stumbled through the hallways into my room and sunk into my bed bringing my legs to my chest to comfort and warm myself. The silence in the building was soon disrupted as it was filled with my heavy and messy sobs.

I didn't sleep that night as my mind was occupied by various thoughts of my life and it's decisions, which I think were not the best, therefore I needed to get my mind of things.I t was 6:00 in the morning when I decided to grab some fuzzy blankets and go up the rooftop, it's really the best place for everything, it brings back good memories and the view really takes your mind off things.

Couple hours later I went back inside as it was getting quite chilly and the blankets didn't have much impact as well as for the fact that I had work at 10am and so as it happens that me and Taehyung were filming a boyfriend/girlfriend scene, but I know I had to suck it up, I'm an actor for a reason.

I pull up to the campus of where we'll be filming, and make my way to the makeup and hair trailer van. The makeup artist soon enough notices my puffy red eyes and gasps.

"What happened? Were you crying???" She asks concerned. I look down and chuckle "Is it really that obvious...? " I asked looking back up at her clearly unable to hide anything. She slowly nods but says nothing else, she realises that's it probably for a private reason, and that it should be none of her business, however the silence just made it more awkward so I spoke up once again "I'm really ok now though, don't worry" I give her my reassuring smile. As I said that she slowly rubbed my back and turned me in my chair to start doing my makeup.

After an hour of sitting there in dead silence I leave the van and go find the director, but before I could he found me first.

"Minah why aren't you with Taehyung?" He asked sounding a bit stressed "What do you mean?" I asked, not noticing how fast my heart started to beat.
"You always come together, why is he not here?"
"I-..." I stop talking before  I could say something too personal and embarrassing, so I think for a good second what I'm going to say. "I...I left Taehyung's apartment yesterday so I could go help my grandmother a bit, and then I slept at my house that night..." I lied.

"You-" before the director could say anything I interrupted "I'm gonna go drive to his home and check" I can't help, but have a worried tone in my voice, I think of the worst scenarios in my head while I make it to my car fumbling through my pocket to find the keys.

I buckle up and sigh, I've been in a suicidal situation before and I know how it feels to be alone and unwanted, I feared that Taehyung took that argument way too deep in the heart, he might regret his actions or words, that's just how he is. Without no hesitation I drove to his house trying to focus as hard as I can on the road ahead.

When I got to the apartment building I rushed to the elevator clicking on the buttons, even though I know it's no use and it won't fasten up the process.

After a lot of fiddling, it finally opens and I awkwardly went up all the way to the 10th floor.

As soon as the elevator doors opened up I dashed to his door. At first I started knocking, but to no avail. I started cursing under my breath until I realised that I knew the passcode... 'I'm such a moron' I sighed to myself.

I entered the home calling out for Taehyung - nothing. It was a dead silence and I gulped very nervously. I started looking around the hallway to have any clues if he has left somewhere or if he's at home, I scan through the shoes until one's peeks my attention. Those particular pair of shoes looked familiar, they were neither mine nor Taehyung's. My breath hitched in my throat, the thought of Taehyung being hurt was replaced by a different thought, but I still didn't want to believe it, or come to a sudden conclusion just yet.

At this point if Taehyung is at home he has already heard me calling out for him, so there's no use to be subtle or move slowly around the house, matter of fact I fastened my step to his room, and before turning the knob I stopped. I took in a big breath, not wishing for the worst to unfold, however God had a different plan for me, was it either to teach me a lesson, or help me grow thick skin and be less vulnerable, but after I had opened the door I still hadn't had a clear of a comprehension of why was life throwing these curveballs at me and really testing my patience.

At that moment my world stopped right in front of me as I saw the sight of Taehyung and Justine in one bed.

Together.

No one is really able to explain the exact feelings you experience during situations like this, but to put it lightly it's like you're gasping for air but can't seem to catch a breath, as your lungs start feeling heavy, eyes watery, and your mind weary.

"W-why...why" I hiccuped through my words, tears already falling uncontrollably.

Taehyung stands up from the bed coming closer to me and I step back.

"Let's talk,I'll explain eve-" Taehyung's brown eyes were locked on me, but I turned my face not having any of it.

"No" you cut him off mid sentence. You suck up the courage, and look him back in the eyes "You don't get to talk here Taehyung " I hiccuped through my words, trying really hard to show that I'm not that affected by this. Clearly that's a lie, and a big one of that. Everyone could see that I was feeling immense pain, heart shattered in million and million pieces, still not knowing how I'll put it back.

"I-I-I tried to be the best of me for you, I..." I bit my lip holding back my sobs, so I could sound clear.

"...I opened up to you and I thought you did too. I thought we were on the same page..." Taehyung wanted to interrupt me but I burst out my pain through my words.

"I thought you promised me! I thought you said you were different from him"  my voice was laced with every possible emotion except happiness.

"Minah...I know you like him more than me" Taehyung finally spoke up, his face had little to no emotion, which broke me even more.

"Do you even hear yourself Taehyung?! Look where you are, with who you are..." My voice softened at the last part.

Taehyung stays silent still looking at me. I didn't say anything for a while as well, however my hiccups and sniffling was definitely evident. The silence made me think about what Taehyung said...I was unsure about my feelings, yes, but I didn't cheat, and I was considerate of him, and still loved him and still do, which I hate for saying.

"Although, I still don't know what I did to deserve this" I spoke up after a while

"You're clearly not good enough for him, you don't have your priorities set straight" Justine all the way from the bed speaks up, her high pitched, bitchy voice spikes through my ears, cracking a nerve at the process.

Not only was she not welcome in this conversation, she had also hurt me, I considered her as my friend.

I was about to make my way to the bed to slap a good one her before Taehyung stopped me by my wrist.

"Don't..." he simply said, knowing well what I was about to do.

I yanked my hand out of his wrist and slapped him instead. He placed one of his hands up to the cheek that I had smacked him on and he slowly brings his face back up to face me. My eyes are teary as I look at him, I blink once letting the tears fall down and without a single word I leave leaving them right where I found them.