The Ultimate Emo Crossover

Godfather Shit

Andy was the first to wake up that morning. He laid on his side and gazed lovingly at Sebastian, who fell asleep with a lit cigarette in his mouth and managed to not burn the house down because his drool got to it first.

He marveled at this specimen of a man. He had the feeling that he had tried to model his whole life after him, and so horribly failed. His fans were crazy about him, and rightfully so, he mused, but at the same time, he felt they didn't love him for him. They loved him for his image. His sexy, sexy image and tight pants. His pert little ass fitted just right, his big blue eyes, piercing your soul--he found himself getting turned on by his own persona, and knew right then and there, there was a big problem.

If he was actually the man he said he was, he would be disgusted by the very sight of himself like any other rational human being, but the fact that he was stroking his fuckin chain right then and there, only went to show that he was attracted to someone else entirely--the man he had become. The man who was not himself.

Clearly a master at his craft, in only two seconds, Andy locates Sebastian's switchblade in his pocket, and unsheathes it, staring at his reflection in the blade.

Sebastian snorts awake from the sound and shoots up. The cigarette is magically lit. Andy is no longer phased by this shit. Still, he meets Sebastian's eyes in shock.

Sebastian swipes the knife from him forcefully and throws it far away from him. "What the hell? You emo fuck. What are you doing?" A dull thud emanates from the other side of the room where the knife impaled itself onto the wall. Sebastian looks over lazily. "Oh," he says, since it really won't leave much of a mark compared to the ten holes in the drywall scattered throughout the room he had punched through.

He turns back to face Andy.

"What's the deal, dude? It's like 11AM. It's too early for this shit. Can we at least have breakfast first before you go around doing that metaphorical shit? Fuck, man."

Andy furrows his brow, confused. He had his cigarette. Why was he being such a dick? "What's your deal, man? It was none of your business."

"Uh!" Sebastian turns his whole body now to face him. "You're in my fucking bed. Am I supposed to wake in a pool of blood? Godfather shit? Oh." Sebastian slowly smirks, "Was this about last night? Was I your first guy? Feeling insecure?"

"No..."

"Oh my god," Sebastian's eyes widen, "You were a virgin." Then his face goes sour. "God, you lost that to me? That's kind of sad, dude. I don't even care about you."

"No! For fuckssake, man. It's neither of those things. Ah, I can't talk to you about it," Andy yells, despite the fact that he was actually kind of a virgin. All that Jesus Christ shit--he wouldn't have been able to part the sea if it wasn't for being a LARPING, anime watching, computer chair ridden young man at heart despite all the leather.

Andy sits with his hands between his legs, slouching towards the mattress, looking lost. Sebastian kicks the covers down to the edge of the bed and sits against the wall with his arms on his knees so he is facing Andy. He squints his eyes at him. "So, what'll it be?"

"What?"

"What's your deal, man?"

Andy sighs and runs a hand through his black hair. From its roots, comes slime and a clump of loose hairs.

Sebastian retracts against the wall. "Are you kidding me? Have you been wearing a wig this whole time?"

Andy looks at him sadly, not knowing what to say because Sebastian is abusive as fuck and, like he said, it's only 11AM and he's exhausted.

"Gimmie that," Sebastian leans over and rips off Andy's wig, throwing it as far away from them as possible. It lands on the knife in the wall, and hangs there limply.

Sebastian cringes at Andy in his wig cap, looking like a 34 year old black woman who proudly didn't give a fuck, running to the corner store for some milk. He rips this off him too, and out his hair falls, black and bouncy, shaved on one side.

Andy hurriedly tries to hide himself, shoving his hands in front of his face and sides of his head. "No!" he yells, "I wish you didn't do that..."

Sebastian looks at him curiously, cocking his head. The irritation wipes from the half of his face that's visible. Gently, he takes both of Andy's arms in his and lowers them back into his lap. "You're afraid of being seen."

Andy looks down and back up again, embarrassed. He blushes. It's pretty.

"You're insecure. You hide your face so you can avoid things. If no one can see you, no one can judge you."

He leans in and moves the hair from Andy's face. His big blue eyes look to Sebastian for approval.

Sebastian then miraculously takes his other hand and brings it to his own face to move the hair away from his right eye. It has shrunk because of the lack of sunlight it has been getting, and there is a visible tan line despite the SPF 100 sunscreen he puts on everyday in hopes people might actually wonder if he is a vampire.

"I know how it feels to not want to be seen."

Andy smiles up bashfully, but looks confused at the same time. "It's a little weird to hear that from you."

"Why?"

"You're a little..." he hesitates, "overly confident..."

"Just say it," Sebastian retorts, "I'm a cunt."

Andy is taken aback. He looks at Sebastian, for the first time, in both his eyes, once again fooled by this man. He is all too self aware, something that didn't seem possible. With his inflated ego, he only thought Sebastian was arrogant--but now, he wondered if his self awareness only led even more to the conclusion that he was genuinely cool and not pretending.

"I disagree."

"Fuck off. I'm a dick, even my mother knows it. Speaking of--I'm hungry as fuck," he lets his hair drop back into his face, lets go of Andy, instantly ruining the moment, once again, with his ADD.

Andy frowns, but quickly jumps as Sebastian stands up on the bed, his crotch totally level with Andy's face, full boner. Andy looks up innocently. "He...he..." he says as if the sexual intercourse they had the night before never happened and Sebastian's hard-on was a potential first kiss.

"Morning wood. Happens every day, doesn't have anything to do with you being here." He jumps over Andy onto the floor. Andy once again is taken aback and sighs audibly.

So, this is how it's gonna be, he thought, Quick glimpses of his real self before he gets lost in another distraction. Moments killed momentarily...better stop getting my hopes up.