Hurt and Hurt Again

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TW!! This chapter does contain sexual assault/harassment! Though it isn't graphic, if you are uncomfortable with things like this, I put it into italics so you can skip it.

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    That night was hard. I was hurting a lot. I was filled with anger, sadness, and even regret. I wondered if I made the wrong decision about letting Soda go. Maybe I did but then again, what if I didn't. What if he really didn't love me as much as he said he did? We never really know the answer to that, do we?

    I called Cherry the next day. I told her everything. She said I made the right decision. She even invited me to her New Year's Eve party. I told her I didn't feel up to it but she didn't give me a choice. She said Marcia would pick me up at eight. 

    I spent half the day dreading that party until Elizabeth spun my mindset around, "Go to that party and enjoy yourself. If you're moping around here or moping around at Sherri's, you're not going to get better. I know you're still hurting and you're allowed to hurt but parties are fun. Go get your mind off of stupid guys. Go hang out with your girlfriends. Most importantly, have fun!"

    That conversation really helped. Around seven, I went and got ready. I had already taken a shower and done my makeup. I put on a nice skirt I had "stolen" from Evie's closet and a blouse. Then I pulled half of my hair back with a clip. 

    When Marcia arrived, I said goodbye to Elizabeth and got in her car. "Wow you look good!"

    "Thanks," I replied. "So do you!"

    She managed not to bring up Sodapop on the way to Cherry's house. I was thankful for that. I hoped news hadn't spread quickly. 

    I was wrong, news did spread quickly. Not many people knew but it was enough to have a few guys brave enough to start making their move. It's not like I was a hot commodity or anything, they were just lonely too.  Marcia quickly led me away from them. We found Cherry in the kitchen standing next to Ponyboy. I was surprised to see him there. A little nervous too. I didn't know how he felt about me after what happened. 

    "Hi Marilyn! I'm so glad you're here," Cherry exclaimed. 

    "Me too," I replied happily. 

    Ponyboy motioned for me to come closer so I did. He whispered in my ear, "We don’t have to talk about what happened but nothing is going to happen to our friendship. Deal?"

    I smiled, "Deal."

    Marcia went and found a group of friends in the living room. Everyone in there was dancing so we joined in. They offered me a drink but I said no. Then they kept pushing and pushing so, eventually, I said yes. I figured I would take a few sips while we danced and throw the rest in the sink when we were done. 

    As we were dancing, I wondered what kind of alcohol it was because it sure was hitting hard. I felt drunk but it wasn't the good kind of drunk. I was getting a terrible headache that was accompanied by dizziness. I left the group and stumbled into the kitchen. I poured the drink into the sink and looked around. I needed to get out. 

    I had to find Cherry or Ponyboy. I started getting anxious when I didn't see them anywhere. I tripped over a table and fell into someone. 

    "Woah there," he said. "Have a little too much to drink tonight?" I couldn't respond. I was too busy looking for Ponyboy. "Let's get you to a bathroom before you puke all over me."

    The guy started to lead me to the bathroom. I let him because I did feel like I was going to puke. "I don't feel too hot," I groaned. 

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