~Intermission~
Audience:
"I cannot believe I just did that." ~Nick Fury, who is now being forced to sit in the audience. Specifically IN THE FRONT ROW SEAT THAT IS CONVENIENTLY STATIONED IN THE MIDDLE
"Oh my god. hOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO TELL YOU PEOPLE!? IT'S MAC AND CHEESE, NOT COLD WATER AND PASTA WITH NO SEASONING (Waiter mumbles something to Gordon Ramsay) weLL FIX IT YOU DUMB FUCK!" ~Gordon Ramsay
(To someone on his right) Yeah. TAHITI is NOT a magical place." ~Phil Coulson
(Casually stealing the person's candy canes) "Now that's some good shit." ~Paul Rudd
"Does anyone know where the donuts and fish are?"~Deke Shaw
(Disgusted) "Why the hell do you need fish with that? It ruins the whole point of donuts." ~ Melinda May
"Oh look, there's CHURROS." ~Daisy Johnson
"oH mY goSh where?" ~Jemma Simmons
"Jemma, don't —"~Leopold Fitz (Fitz was too late, Jemma already bumped into a chocolate fountain. Thankfully, she didn't ruin her clothes or anything)
"You know, this is a great play. Probably better than Hamilton." ~Barack Obama
"Oh my gOD guys be QUIET it'S sTarTiNg."~ Josh Gad
(Behind them lays a large statue of Loki that was on Asgard, which Loki permanently stuck to the ground so good luck to the Avengers when they try to cut it out)
RHODEY (Scott): It's been 23 days since Thanos came to Earth.
TONY (Peter): 23? That's too long. How come we don't know where he is by now?
NATASHA (Shuri): Well world governments are in pieces. The parts that are still working are trying to take a census. And it looks like he did exactly what he said he was gonna do. Thanos wiped out fifty percent, of all living creatures and orgasms.
STEVE (Sam): (concerned for the mental wellbeing of Shuri) Please don't say orgasms
NATASHA (Shuri): But it's my brand. You don't disrespect my brand like that
STEVE (Sam): (Giving up) Ok then
TONY (Peter): Where is he now? Did you seriously not hear me?
STEVE (Sam): We don't know. He just opened a portal and walked through.
(Cut to a shot of a sullen-looking THOR (Vision), sitting on a bench, trying to look like he's thinking really hard, but actually looks like he's about to lay an egg.)
TONY (Peter): What's wrong with him?
ROCKET (Played by a dummy): Oh, he's pissed. He thinks he failed. Which of course he did, but ya know there's a lot of that's going around, ain't there?
TONY (Peter): Are you a Build-A-Bear or something? Cause if you are, I'm naming you Sparkles
ROCKET (Played by the dummy once again): Maybe I am.
TONY (Peter): Ok Sparkles
STEVE (Sam): We've been hunting Thanos for three weeks now. And we got nothing.
YOU ARE READING
Avengers: The Group Chat
FanfictionRhodey obsessed with making fanfictions (and in love with Thor), Scott trying to join the bandwagon, Natasha being the most straightforward person in the chat/world, Is Clint even a spy? Tony, for the first time in his life, doesn't know what the he...
