Even So//Bang Chan X Reader {Completed}

Chapter 19

I was shocked, to say the least, I'm sure we all thought Chan was the strongest of the 10 of us. but to know that we had someone like that on our side, gave us a newfound hope. we've already won!

I hold his one hand with both of mine "thank you for joining! with you on our side I'm sure no one can stop us!" I said with a triumphant smile.

I started forming a plan in my head with this new knowledge. a plan where no one will be hurt. a plan where we all make it out alive, that's the only plan that I will work on.

that night we came up with a plan, we leave tomorrow. we should get to the MR lab with 15 days to spare. cause maybe then we can end this machine before he even has the slightest chance to use it. that's the plan and we're hoping we can use Changbin's power to put an end to the machine forever.

we found a hotel to stay at for the night, I couldn't help but feel like even if we have 15 days to spare when we get there we still might be too late, but then again maybe I'm just thinking too much into this.

that night I laid awake beside Chan, I couldn't fall asleep there was too much doubt in my mind about this entire thing. 

the fear consumed me, how am I supposed to keep it together if I knew someone might not make it out alive, that kind of guilt is something I can't contain, what if I can stop it by telling Chan or someone else? what if it will change nothing?

I don't know what to do and that's a rarity and it's scaring me. 

the next morning I pretended to be asleep when Chan woke up, I didn't want him to worry about me not getting enough sleep. he doesn't need anything else on his plate right now. 

once Chan got up and left the room quietly, I laid there for a few more minutes before getting up, shower, and changing into some sweat pants and a teeshirt. 

when I walked downstairs with my bag everyone was there even Changbin, they looked like they were ready to head out any moment, Chan was the first one to greet me, he even gave me a muffin claiming I needed to keep my strength up.

I thanked him before we loaded up the van and started on our 4-day drive. 

Changbin sat in the very back with Felix, then the next row was Hyunjin and Seungmin, and Jeongin, then Minho and Jisung, Chan was driving and I was beside him upfront. 

I was silent most of the drive that day and all the other drives. it was hard to be happy when I was filled with guilt and regret.

I still couldn't wrap my head around the fact we might lose one of the members of our family. then later we'd lose another cause of the grief that follows... and just the fact that no one else knows is killing me. 

what if I can't change the outcome?

that's when it hit me... I've touched everyone in this car, the only flash I got was from Chan. which only means one thing...

I'm the one who won't make it out alive...

I brought my knees close to my chest and hid my head in my knees, I wasn't crying, I was in shock and I didn't want to face anyone, I shut everything out as I got lost in my own sad thoughts.

a few minutes later we pulled into a rest stop for a restroom break. I didn't get out of the car with everyone else. Chan saw that I felt off, so he stayed behind too. he placed his hand on my back once everyone left. 

"What's the matter baby girl?" he asked and I shook my head "I'm fine," I told him but his hand never left my back "we both know that's a lie" he spoke softly, his voice filled with concern.

I looked up at him, I looked into his eyes and thought hard, should I tell him? should I risk it?

maybe if I tell him I can at least stop him from killing himself later down the line. I take a deep breath as I finally spoke

"Remember the day you asked me to be your girlfriend?" I asked and he nodded with a hum "Well as soon as I said yes, I got a flash... you killed yourself, Chan." I said this with tears in my eyes, he looked a bit shocked but got ahold of himself none the less

"I'm not dying Y/n" he spoke softly again as his hand rubbed my back.

"you don't understand! before we met Changbin. I ran so many different plans in my head and someone always died, that's when I realized someone's not going to make it out alive and that's the reason you're going to kill yourself" I said as I start sobbing, Chan froze, he didn't know what to think. he already lost Woojin, he couldn't take losing another brother

I got it together as much as I could so I can tell him who it is before the others come back. I looked into his sad eyes before I spoke

"You're the only one who gave me a flash" I spoke and he put everything together, before he could speak a tear fell from his eye. I looked away before I heard the doors to the car opening and the playful bantering filling our ears. 

Chan snapped out of it and dried his tears before others noticed, he made sure everyone was buckled before he started the car and we continued on our long journey 

I stayed silent the entire drive once again

but little did we all know, the torture, pain, and betrayal that waited for us at the MR company's lab

something that we won't be able to recover from...