Ongoing Cycle

54

Black. The sign of mourning and death. It was the color they were wearing on this gloomy day, as they stood in the fields under the cloudy sky. A lot of people came to the funeral. The crowd watching the coffin being lowered into the hole that was made, people sniffed and cried at the sight of it. Feeling a little out of place since she hadn't actually met Mr. Ideka, [Y/N] glanced around her surroundings instead. The ground littered of tombs that were placed on top of all the bodies buried underground, she would be lying if she said it didn't slightly unnerve her.

Feeling unusual in her new attire of a black, plain long-sleeve dress, she wished she could go home.

A hand clasped around her wrist and she turned her head to see Kuro, looking handsome in a black dress shirt and dress pants. His eyes were glued to the scene in front of them. She could see that they were filled with anger and unlike everyone here, he wasn't crying. It was a bit ironic to her, considering how he was the son of this man and should be one of the closest love ones to him.

Softly placing her other hand on top of his, she soothingly stroked it. He was probably angry at himself for everything that had happened, and it saddened her to see him think this way. She wanted him to know that none of this was his fault.

A sudden thought hit her. Anxiously staring at the boy beside her, she didn't know whether she should ask the query or not. Would it be too insensitive? Her curiosity wouldn't let her continue her day without the answer though. "Hey Kuro?" she whispered to him. He finally took his eyes off the casket and the anger in them was gone the second they landed on hers. "Is your mother here?"

Though they weren't angry, they hardened at her question. Pulling his hand away from her, she frowned when his warmth left her. "No," he stiffly told her. His tone sounded flat and final, as if warning her not to prod any further. And well...she didn't. She had learned from her past mistakes not to pressure anyone into telling her their problems; She had to wait until they were ready to tell her.

But it didn't stop her from wondering. Why would his mother not be here for her husband's funeral? It didn't seem to make sense at all. Maybe she had just as much of a rocky relationship with Mr. Ideka as Kuro did. That may have been the case...but then again, where was she currently? If Kuro was staying with her family, then where was Mrs. Ideka staying? [Y/N] assumed that with a death of a family member, the best thing to do was to stay close with the rest of the family members. In this situation, it was far from it.

As the workers shoveled dirt on top of the coffin, the constant metal was hit. Clank! Clank!

The sound was suffocating to her and now, more than ever did she want to leave. As her imagination took place, she could sense how dark and cold it would be down there. It would be all lonely and she could never leave once she's down there. Stuck forever in a trap, the body would be left to rot, useless while the Earth continued to turn. She would never see anyone again, chained to a black void of nothingness.

Shivering into her thin dress, she tightly held onto the fabric of it. She didn't want to think about death any longer. When was she going home? When was she going home -

Her mind repeating the same question in her head, and she began to feel a little dizzy. Bile rising in her throat, she forced herself to swallow it down. It was her this time that grasped Kuro's shirt, her legs wobbly and barely supporting herself. The boy took one look at her and grew concerned.

The moment the burial ended, he pulled her away from the funeral. "We're leaving, now."

Surprised, she shot him a look of confusion. "Wh-what do you mean? Shouldn't you pay your respects to your father?"

"I never bought flowers in the first place," he argued, laughing bitterly. "I'd rather not...not to that shitty old man anyway."

Incredulously, she just stared at him for a minute. She did not expect this at all, not when he was crying a week ago for his father, the moment he first came to her house. "I don't understand, Kuro. He was still your father."

He sighed and grabbed both of her hands, his eyes no longer hardened. He pressed multiple kisses on the back of her soft skin and longingly glanced at her. "I know, but you're my top priority. You cared for me within the last few months more than he had my entire life. You're looking ill right now and I need to take you home for you to rest. I don't want you sick on my behalf. The only reason you're out in the cold wearing a flimsy dress is because of me."

Nodding silently at his reasoning, she allowed him to lead them towards the parking lot, where his car sat. The two of them climbed in and before he started the engine, he muttered something to her. It was very quiet, but it was loud enough that she could hear it. "I love you."

Blushing immensely and her heart ramming against her chest, she almost let out a gasp. Kuro was throwing multiple curveballs at her today and she didn't know what the hell to do. What was going on inside this boy's head? Did this funeral somehow made him so brazen, the way it made her sick?

"Didn't....I say that we're...taking things slow from now on?" she choked out, her voice just as low.

"Of course," he whispered, his face full of regret and sadness. "I couldn't wait any longer. I wanted you to know how I feel. I'm sorry for offending you, love."

She bit her lip and immediately felt guilty. She rushed to form an explanation to lessen the pain on his face. "That raw memory still hurts and I can barely look at you without thinking back to that night. But...whenever I can finally bear it, I'll say it back to you. I promise."