God with Whiskers

Ragnar

Thor was sitting on his couch, leaning slightly forward, his eyes narrowed. In front of him, sitting on the coffee table was a small black cat, looking right back at him with a very similar expression.

"Now listen here." Thor murmured in a low angry voice. "I'm the one living here you got that? I don't know what it is you want. But whatever it is, get it somewhere else!"

"Dude, you know you are talking to a cat right?" Korg asked.

Thor hissed in annoyance.

"I mean, cats don't understand people language right?" Korg asked. "Or... Do they? I will admit I am not very familiar with Earth species."

"Korg... be quiet." Thor asked, then turned back to the cat. He pointed a finger. "Get out of my house!" he demanded.

Only for the cat to jump up and bite his finger.

"ARGH!" Thor shouted, immediately retracting his hand. "You saw that right?!" He asked Korg, waving his hurt hand.

"We already know the cat doesn't like you dude." Korg said in his usual laid back voice.

"Well, you don't have to like me! That's fine!" Thor hissed at the cat. "But why then DO YOU HAVE TO KEEP FOLLOWING ME!?" he shouted.

The cat hissed back at him.

Thor groaned as he sat back. The cat was not going to move, it seemed. He grabbed for the remote and turned on the television.

Humans had proven themselves to be very creative with their entertainment; what was called a sit-com was playing on the screen. The laugh track signaling a joke had just been spoken and Thor leaned back sighing.

Suddenly, a small black body jumped up and there was a furry creature sitting right in front of the screen blocking the view... and once again the green eyes were glaring at him.

"Are you serious right now?" Thor asked.

The cat just kept looking at him... why did it have to always look so judgmental? Thor groaned as he stood up and headed for the counter in the kitchen.

He pulled out a glass and a bottle of whiskey, uncorking the bottle and pouring himself up a healthy glass.

Sighing Thor put the bottle back and turned to pick up his drink, only to halt... THE CAT WAS ON THE COUNTER! Sitting right next to the glass of whiskey. Its green eyes, looking right at Thor... then slowly... slowly it lifted a paw.

"Hey!" Thor exclaimed. "Don't you dare!"

The paw moved closer, closer to the glass.

"In the All Father's name I demand that you..." Thor began.

The raised paw shoved at the glass, which fell off the counter and shattered on the ground.

"ARGGH!" Thor yelled grabbing his hair as he stared at the mess of spilled alcohol and glass shards. "Won't you let me have anything?!" he shouted.

The cat was grinning.

"Okay that's it!" Thor exclaimed. "YOU STUPID CAT!"

Valkyrie couldn't help but be astounded as she came for her daily visit to Thor's house. It was routine for her, every day after work she would check on him. Most of the time it would be quiet, Thor would usually either be sleeping or sprawled out in front of the television, either playing games or watching brain dead sitcoms. This time though, there was big crashes sounding from inside of the house! There were yells, big booms and then suddenly, a furry creature came jumping through the window.