Neverending Thoughts & Feelings | Poems

Selfishness | pt. 1

My selfishness is not allowed to succeed.
I can't be selfish. Not even once.
Because all it causes is pain for everyone I love.

There has to be another way..
I should be glad that my selfishness has not succeeded in the past.
It would've not been worth it.

But I'm not worth it either..

Please stop caring about me.
So I can be selfish. Just once.

It's always you, who is the selfish one.
Trying your best to convince me to stay.
I can never be selfish, not once, because I'd break your heart.
I'd let you down.

Because of you, I can't be selfish.
Because of you, I can't reach my biggest dream.

Because of you.

Because you don't understand.

I'm almost there.
It's so close.

It's finally going to happen.
I'm really excited.

But then I feel something different.
An ache through my heart, I couldn't do this.
I feel...

guilty.

I couldn't do this after all.
I couldn't do this to you.
I couldn't make my biggest dream come true..

Because of you..

I'm stuck.

In a world full of pain.