The Awkward Boy's Crush (BxB)

Chapter 16

("I love it when the skies can't sleep. I left a message encased in me. So bye, bye. A flawless ending. So beautiful... you're so...")

I'm so nervous right now. I've been thinking all day, and it's already evening now. We'll be with the guys so it'll be alright, right? I don't wanna be too conscious in front of him. He won't notice, right?

There were still so many questions left unanswered. I'm sure I like him, right? It's not like I have a lot of experience. But I don't think you just start having dreams of your friend. And that too like the one I had. Right??

But I can't just show it. I have to act normal, like I always do around him. I can't risk this friendship. What if it's just some infatuation which will go away in a month? Like sometimes, you watch a movie and are infatuated with the actor. It just goes away in like three months. Doesn't a simple crush go away in three months or something? I think I read it somewhere.

But I know I don't have these physical attraction stuff with people. Like if I wanted to like Kai like that, I'd have been obsessed since the day I saw him. I mean, look at him. And after thinking for so long, I know it's not just some attraction. I think I genuinely like him. Even more than I liked Joe then. Spending this much time with him, listening to him, laughing with him; I get why I could like him.

But what if it's that? That I needed someone close. That I'm projecting my insecurity and need that way. I had Books, yes. But Kai and I spend way too much time together. More than Books and I did at school. And I love it. What if it's that? Nah... I wouldn't have dreams of him like that right. That had never happened with Books nor will it ever. Eww. Can't imagine. No. Nope.

Oh... I've been dreaming about Kai for a while now. It was always the moments I loved the most from the time I spend with him. Just the recent one was a bit...

I felt the temperature of face rise and a smile starting to creep in. Covering my face with my hand, I focused on the outside through the window.

But the biggest fear is what if Kai can never see as more than a friend? I mean he likes guys, yes. But that doesn't mean he'll like me. That made me frown a bit. He-

"What's up with you? You're not even singing along to the songs you played on speaker. It looks like something's been on your mind since the morning." My thoughts came to an abrupt halt because of my mom, sitting beside me and driving.

Mom glanced at me briefly and focused on the road. Since Duke's place is far, she decided to drive me there.

"No nothing. I was thinking of the games we'll play while looking outside. How close are we?"

"Close. I think five more minutes... I'm so glad you made so many friends. You've never had a sleepover after 7th grade or was it 6th grade. Have fun."

"Yeah mom."

We reached our destination after a few minutes.

"When will you come back tomorrow?"

"After breakfast I guess. I'll call. Bye."

_____________________

"Hey Marc." Duke opened the door for me. "Right on time. Guys, Marc is here." Duke announced my arrival to the others already there.

I greeted the others and took a seat on the couch. David offered me some soft drink. Felix, Ezra and Marvin were already there. Marvin and David were watching TV and Felix was talking about some movie with Ezra. It's usually me or Ezra he talks to about movies.

"Some people say the movie is messy. It's not perfect but I love the concept of an unreliable narrator in a movie. Like was he blind then? Did he kill the lady? The support cane he had had a hare carved on its handle, then he must've seen it was a hare." Ezra nodded to it and I decided to join in on the conversation as well.