I'm A Mess || l.c

9- Long Hair Slicked Back, White T-Shirt

I had a sudden craving of being around him again. It was another day and I was feeling lost and empty without his words and his subtle attempts to make me laugh. I told Dani about him and she seemed to have accepted my choices of hanging out with James. I was not planning on telling anyone else about him just yet.

"Are you guys going out again today?" Dani asked as she painted her nails black. Dani's change of style left me speechless before but now I had grown used to seeing Dani wear different clothes. They were different from what other people usually wore, but it was a good kind of different.

"Yeah, I hope so," I replied as I once again reminisced over yesterday's events. "I should text him and see what he wants to do."

"He doesn't always have to decide what to do. Why don't you think of something?" Dani suggested. I couldn't think of anything that was romantic but not too romantic, and serious but not too serious.

"I can't think of anything, Dani! Help me," I pouted. Dani sighed and closed the bottle of nail polish, then sat back on her bed and looked as if she was deep in thought.

"Well, you could go to a cafe or to a frozen yoghurt place. That's always a cute date idea," Dani suggested.

"Yeah, but I want something more. Something more on the romantic side. I don't want him to think that we're just friends," I stated.

"Go out for dinner?"

"Too romantic," I replied as I scrunched up my nose.

"Then I can't exactly help you if you're just going to smack away my ideas. I can't think of anything else. You'll come up with something. You always do," Dani said as she got out her earphones and plugged them into her phone, signalling to me that she did not want to be disturbed any more.

I sighed and decided to just text James and see what he wanted to do.

*

My plans with James for today were finally decided through a text conversation. We thought of doing the cliche movie thing although it didn't matter that the idea was cliche because all I really cared about was the person I spent my time with. I looked through my closet and ended up throwing almost everything on top of my bed.

After a while of playing the 'yes or no' game with my clothes, I decided on the outfit that I wore earlier this year to a One Direction concert; a demure floral crop top underneath a black kimono-cardigan and black shorts.

It wasn't until another three hours that I had to get ready so I planned on going downstairs and watching TV. Christina was currently watching Eye Candy which I had heard was a new show on MTV that was apparently interesting and addictive. I hadn't talked to Christina much after what she had told everyone. I felt as if I wouldn't be able to connect with her anyway since I was still too heartbroken over the fact that she was leaving soon. Even though that 'soon' meant in another few months, it still dawned on me every time that each day was closer to the day that she would get married and leave.

I sat down on the soft couch comfortably with my legs propped up and held securely by my hands. I was just watching the screen, not really paying attention to what was going on since Christina was only a few feet away from me.

"Lauren, are you mad at me?" she asked after an awkward silence.

"No. I'm just sad that you're leaving soon," I replied.

"I'm so sorry. If I could, I would make it up to you but-"

"But no! You can't make it up to me. I can't believe I'm being so selfish over this, but I will really miss you and I need you," I interrupted her.