Star Wars one shots

You Can't Hide Grief - - Obi-Wan Kenobi

I have no idea what this is!
Just a little Drabble because I'm feeling bad but I hope you enjoy!

She was so excited to tell you how she had assembled her lightsaber - all by herself! And she had a rough time trying to find her kyber crystal but she remembered everything that Master Yoda had taught her.

You regaled stories from your youth, from when you were picked by Master Plo Koon himself to when you were stuck on Crait with a broken ship and an anxious Obi Wan Kenobi.

She'd laugh but only quietly, she was a quiet child who'd fought so hard to get to where she was, the separatists had tried to capture Jedi younglings and she was one of them. Nyrrah. You'd met her before, when she was less than four years old. Her bright green eyes resonated in your mind, and when she came trailing behind Master Yoda you knew she'd stay by your side for years to come.

Only the years to come came too soon.

You blame yourself for not enforcing the importance of following orders, no matter how much Obi Wan told you she stayed around Anakin too long.

You blame yourself for not putting your body in between hers and Asajj Ventriss' lightsaber.

And now you try your best to keep a neutral face during the long and tedious council meetings. You'd have Obi-Wan Kenobi staring at you, knowing how numb you felt inside but if you let those feelings get to you, you'd be more at risk of submitting to the dark side.

After the council meeting, you were the first to leave, just wanting to be left alone. You'd just sleep, still finding it too difficult to meditate because you'd just see her face and you didn't want to be reminded of the failure of a master that you were.

"A new Padawan we will assign you, Master Y/N." Master Yoda had asked you two weeks after her burial beneath the Jedi temple.

"That's quite alright, Master Yoda."

"The feelings, you must not let get to you."

"I'm just wanting some time to prepare before a new Padawan." You'd swallowed thick, the words hanging heavy in your throat.

"Great suffering, I feel in you Y/N. Let go, you must."

"I'm working on it." You'd bowed before leaving and ultimately spending the night crying yourself to sleep.

A soft had grabbed yours and pulled you into an empty hallway and you looked up to see Obi-Wan staring into your full E/C eyes.

"Obi." You mumbled, he hugged you tightly and you rested your chin on his shoulder.

"Y/N, I'm so sorry, I've been so preoccupied with Anakin and the 212th that I haven't had time to check up on you." Obi-Wan muttered in your ear. You wrapped your arms around his neck and kept him close.

"I'm okay, Obi." Such a lie and the Jedi knew it.

"Y/N, please don't lie to me." Obi Wan pulled away and held your arms in his hands. "I can feel how numb you are. I can't let this be how you feel everyday."

"I-It won't be, Obi. I promise." You choked out, forcing back tears. Obi Wan cupped your cheeks and pressed your foreheads together. You gripped onto his wrists and sighed, closing your eyes.

"Tell me I can help. Tell me I can make this all go away."

"Not unless you can bring back my Padawan." A tear fell down your cheek. "I want so badly to bring her back, to put myself in her position." Obi Wan shook his head.

"Y/N, you know that would only put her in your position." You nodded softly.

"I don't want this pain anymore." You whimpered, feeling your chest heave. You sobbed softly into Obi Wan's chest, clinging to him tightly. Moving you with him, Obi Wan shifted you into one of the empty rooms so you could have your peace and quiet with each other. He just let you cry.

It was every time you closed your eyes, her soft red locks and her bouncy energy. Her readiness to learn, always wanting to battle or meditate.

"One day I'm going to fight Master Kenobi and I'm going to win!"

You cried and cried, Obi Wan couldn't do anything but hold you in his arms.