Survivor

Chapter Twenty-Four

"Oh my god," Lindsey breathes, running a hand through her long platinum blonde hair. "She's gonna be okay, right?" She asks, looking at Alex.

"Those two are the best cardio and ortho surgeons we have, she's in good hands. Let's go to the waiting room." The peds surgeon suggests.

Lindsey nods and follows him, but Meredith, Derek, and Maggie stay behind to talk to Jake and Ryan. They cross the ER, slipping behind the curtain where both men are.

"Meredith, are you okay?" Jake asks as soon as he sees her.

"Yeah, thanks to you." She smiles softly. The blonde man relaxes, and Meredith approaches his bed, studying him. "Did anyone do a neuro exam on you?"

"A what?"

Meredith doesn't answer, instead glancing around for a light. She has one on her at all times when she's working, but right now, she's not working. "Hand me that," she requests to Derek, pointing at the penlight on the tray next to him. He hands it to her, and she shines the light into Jake's eyes, performing her own neuro exam. "Pupils are slow, we should get you a head CT. Where's the doctor that brought you in at first?"

"Um...some guy in light blue scrubs...brown hair?"

"Interns," Meredith grumbles. "I'll put it in your chart." She takes a pen, scribbling something down on Jake's chart.

"How's Olivia?" Ryan joins in the conversation, mumbling through his wrapped jaw, which from the looks of it is broken.

"They're taking her into surgery, she was shot twice," Derek tells them quietly.

"Fuck," Jake breathes, collapsing back into bed.

"I'm going to sit with Lindsey in the waiting area," Meredith says, then leaves the men and quickly crosses the ER, avoiding people as much as possible.

She finds the waiting room and a distressed-looking blonde standing in the corner.

"Hi, I don't think I've officially introduced myself. I know we met at the trial but I was kind of...out of it." Meredith says, reaching Lindsey.

"Meredith." The platinum blonde recognizes her instantly.

"Olivia saved my life. Actually, three times now." Meredith smiles slightly, taking a seat and patting next to her for the other woman to sit too, which she does.

"She has a habit of putting herself right in the middle of danger like that."

"Yeah, she does." Meredith leans back in her chair, looking around, and sighs. "It's so different on this side."

"What do you mean?"

"I'm a surgeon. I'm usually on the other side, scrubbed in, knowing exactly what's going on at all times. I'm not used to being on this side of things. It's different."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah."

"She's gonna be okay, right?" Lindsey looks at Meredith, her eyes watering.

Meredith bites her lip, choosing her words carefully. "We're not supposed to make promises because we can't promise anything, but Cristina and Callie and the best cardio and ortho surgeons we have here. They'll do absolutely everything they can."

Lindsey buries her head in her hands. "She has to be...I don't know what I'd do without her."

"You two are great together. I haven't seen you too much but I can tell. Just, the way you look at each other...I want that."

"Have you seen the way Derek looks at you?"

"Yes..." Meredith admits, dropping her gaze. "Before William, I thought I had found the man I was going to spend the rest of my life with. I know he loves me, and I still love him. But I can't give him anything. He deserves better than a girl who he can't even touch, who's afraid of everything, and who doesn't know how to open up about her feelings."