chapter eleven

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November

A week had gone by since I was at Luna's which seemed crazy to me. Time seemed to move faster as the end of the semester neared closer.

I hadn't spoken to Danny since our last encounter. He sent me one measly text but it wasn't even anything worthy responding to. As for Eli and I, our trip to Maine was already here. He planned on picking me up an hour, and because I'm the planner that I am, I packed everything the night before. Thankfully, work was willing to give me three days off. Since finals were approaching rather fast, Eli thought it was best to make it a quick trip. Even though he'd be seeing his family for the holiday, Eli decided to visit this week so I'd be able to tag along.

For only a couple moments throughout the last week did I debate on getting out of this trip. Being the idiot that I seemed to be lately, I still haven't told Eli about me and Danny's kiss. Multiple opportunities presented themself, especially before Eli and I shared Halloween night together. Yet every time I tried to gain the courage to just spit out the words, I chocked.

But I knew I couldn't bail on Eli no matter how stupid I may be acting. I wanted to be there for him and meet his family, even if I still was hiding a secret that could ruin how he viewed me. It was my mistake, and I knew I only made everything worse by not saying anything before we got in the car together for six hours.

I guess I now knew how it felt for Danny, trying to obtain the courage to tell me that he had been kissing another girl while we were together. I hated to think of myself in a similar situation as Danny was.

To make matters worse, I've been lying to Louise. After my encounter with Danny at Luna's, which I did tell her about - yet leaving out the part where Danny tried to kiss me again, - and I may have lied to her that I finally told Eli about what I did. Her constant questions and caring pestering about the situation finally got to me. That, and I didn't want to let her down anymore.

I still felt like a terrible friend to her, even though I know it was ridiculous for her to be jealous that I was dating Eli. I just wanted her to stop looking at me like I messed up everything my first semester of college. It was better if she didn't know, for now at least.

While packing last night, an awful part of me debated back and forth the idea of not telling Eli about what happened. I knew Louise would kill me if I didn't tell him, let alone know that I've been lying to her. Even if I did decided to pretend as if the kiss never happened, that would make me worse than Danny. At least he had the guts to tell me what happened when we were dating.

I checked the time on my phone as it neared ten o'clock, expecting Eli to text me any minute that he's arrived. I felt more anxious as the time got closer, still trying to grapple everything that I've been thinking, specifically in the last twenty-four hours.

I walked towards my mirror to assess myself one last time before leaving. I decided to wear one of Eli's hoodie's I've been borrowing, along with a pair of leggings and my UGG boots. If I was to be stuck in the car for numerous hours at a time, I at least wanted to be comfy.

I stuffed Dreamcatcher into my purse alongside my computer in its bag. I'm hoping that either in the car ride there or back, or even just before going to sleep, that I could get some words down for my short story. My goal was to try and get it finished before finals, especially so I didn't have to worry about anything else other than studying. I felt good about where I was in my assignment, hoping that it wasn't all completely trash with zero chance of winning.

Luckily for me, Louise had stayed the night over in Riley's dorm after another frat party last night, so I didn't have to face any other questions this morning before I left. I sprayed some of my dry shampoo into my hair before shoving it into my suitcase. Even though I would rarely wear leggings as an outfit in public, with Eli, I started to care less and less about all the silly rules I had made for myself.

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