Ask Death (DIMBFF)

Princess Pedro frolicking in the beach

Em: What's that funny smell?... *sniff sniff*

*sniffs to the closet*

....

*sniffs*

Em: Good heavens. It's inside that closet....

*sniffs*

*opens closet*

Em: oH MY G-

Death: Word.

Em: Holy sh*t you startled me. I cannot believe you brought a rotting corpse here!

Death: I was going to get rid of that...

Em: *gasps*

Death: What are you even doing here? This is my office. I'll put millions of corpse inside that closet if I wanted to.

Em: *gasps louder*

Death: IF YOU EVER SNOOP AROUND MY STUFFS AGAIN THEN I'LL PROBABLY KILL BILLIONS OF PEOPLE, PROBABLY END HUMANITY, AND SHOVE ALL OF YOU HERE. IN. MY. F*CKING. CLOSET.

Em: Is that your... underwear? Ew...

Death: WERE YOU EVEN LISTENING TO ME?

Em: You do know that there's a dirty underwear in your couch, right?

Death: What the hell do you care?! Just leave my underwear alone! Just-

*closes eyes*

*sighs*

*pinches the nose's bridge*

get your ass out of this room. Like, why are you even here...

Em: Why so grumpy? Oh, and pack up. We're going to the beach today. Yayy, aren't you excited?

Death: I'm busy.

Em: No, you're not.

Death: Yes, I am.

Em: No, you're not.

Death: YES I AM.

Em: I asked Devin if you're gonna be busy and he told me you're free the whole day.

Death: I DON'T WANT TO GO TO THE BEACH. It's not even summer.

Em: Pft. Is liwl Deathy here afwaid of Mr. Sun? D'awe.

Death: I'm not going to the beach. PERIOD.

x x x x x x x x x x x x x

*at the beach*

Em: Oh, and I thought you didn't like beaches.

Death: *puts sun glasses up* *drinks coconut juice with umbrellas on top* *applies sun block*

Em: ...you even wore khaki shorts. I didn't even know you own one.

Death: I own SO many things, for your information. And you forced me to come here, so why not enjoy it, right?

Em: You just agreed because I told you there will be women here in their bikinis...

Death: And that too... *stares at girls playing volleyball*

Em: Why won't you just admit that you like beaches??

Death: Correction, *raises a finger* not beaches, but b*tches. In bikinis, specifically. Do you think I like staying in the sun? I'm the grim-reaper for f*ck's sake, I should be in the dark. Lurking.