Indifference (boyxboy)

38. Drown You in Gold

Ryan

After saying goodbye to everyone, I headed outside, feeling like I was walking on air. Tonight couldn't have gone any better. I put my hand in my pocket and curled it round the folded piece of paper with Elijah's writing on it. It was easily already my most treasured possession.

As I stepped outside, I came to an abrupt stop. My mum was standing just outside the school gates.

I walked over slowly, already dreading what she had to say.

When she heard me approaching, she turned to me and smiled.

"You were amazing," she said.

"You saw me?!"

"Yes, so did your dad. We were sat at the back."

I didn't know what to say. Neither of them had ever come to anything before.

"So you and Elijah then?" she said, and I was relieved to see that she was still smiling.

"Erm, yeah," I said, scratching the back of my neck.

I grimaced as I realised that my dad would have seen my message about being bi-sexual.

"Is Dad ok with it?"

"Yeah, he'll be fine. I think he's more pissed off that he owes me 20 quid."

"20 quid? Why?"

My mum laughed. It wasn't a sound I heard very often.

"Becuase I made a bet with him about 10 years ago that at least one of my children would turn out to be gay."

"But I'm not gay, I'm bi-sexual."

"That was his argument too! But I'm still saying I won."

"But why would you even bet something like that?" I asked, totally bewildered that my parents would even discuss such a thing.

My mum suddenly stopped smiling and sighed.

"One day you need to ask your dad about his father."

"You've told me before. He was killed in a hit and run, and they never caught who did it."

My mum grimaced slightly.

"Yeah, that's not the whole story. There was a reason why your grandma left the community and moved away. And there's a reason why your dad never went back to them."

"Oh," I said, suddenly realising where this was going. "Yeah, I'll ask him sometime. Come on, let's get home," I said, starting to feel chilly from the cold night air.

"Erm, that's something else I have to tell you," she said, making no move to start walking. "I'm leaving tonight."

"Already?"

"Yes, our flight is tomorrow morning."

"Oh," I said as it suddenly occurred to me that she hadn't dressed up for the concert, but because she was meeting Bryan.

"I know there is nothing I can say or do that will make this any easier for you, and please believe me when I say that I am so sorry, but I need you to have this."

Then she thrust an envelope into my hands.

"What is it?" I asked.

"It's a bank card. I've opened up an account in your name. There's £100 already in there."

"What?" I asked in shock. "No! Take it back, I don't want your money."

"No, you have to!" she said desperately. "Your dad, he loves you all to bits, he really does. But he's an addict. And he's not going to change. I need you to have this. I need to know that you're going to be ok."