No One Can Reach Me | Changlix

The Truth

Felix opened his eyes, staring up at the ceiling of his dorm room.
The first thing he noticed was the smell of the bed, it smelled like Changbin.
The second thing he felt was the pain in his body, his hips were hurting.
The third thing he remembered, was what happened the night before.

The door of his dorm opened and Changbin entered the room. He immediately moved to the bed when he noticed that Felix was awake. His hand gently pressing down on his forehead. "How are you feeling? Is your body alright?" His voice was so soft and gentle, a shiver went down Felix his spine. Changbin looked happy, a bit too happy for Felix his liking, considering he was the one whose body was in pain after that maniac was done with him. He gave the man a pout before pulling the blankets up hiding his face. He was embarrassed, everything he had done, the confession. He curled up in a ball, a sharp pain shooting through his hips. Changbin tried to pull the blankets back. "Wait... let me see your face, I want to kiss you. I thought we could finally be a lovely couple, you know waking up together, hugging, kissing... don't tell me you turn shy now." Felix pushed the blankets back, throwing a pillow at the man's face before laying down again pulling the blankets back up to cover him.

"I have to go, my class starts in 20 minutes and I have an exam..." Changbin said with a pout in his voice, making Felix lower the covers. As soon as Felix his face is exposed Changbin pressed a kiss on his lips. "I love you..." Felix smiles and nods. There was something in his eyes, something Changbin could not place. "I will see you after class okay?" He said but Felix had pulled the covers back up over his head, falling back asleep.

Changbin laid down on his desk letting out a groan. He had been distracted during the entire exam. Last night Felix finally admitted to his feelings and that made him happy, finally he could make progress with him, but there was something in his eyes this morning. Something that worried him. Maybe it would be the same as the previous time, one night together and Felix would distant himself again. He checked the clock, 30 minutes before the next class, maybe he could quickly run by the dorm and check on him. He could make it, if he was quick. But before he could run to the dorm, Hyunjin sat down on the seat across from him.

Changbin suddenly remembered how the man had kicked him out of the room and crossed his arms. He opened his mouth to speak but Hyunjin held up his hand "I know you are angry that I kicked you out last night, but I can make it up with you." Changbin raised an eyebrow, giving the man a disbelieving look. "Remember how you said that Felix did not want to admit to his feelings, and how you know he loved you back and all that bullshit." Changbin wanted to tell the man that Felix admitted his feelings but the moment Hyunjin started rambling, it was difficult to get a word in between, and it seemed like he was well on its way today. "Well, I kind of felt bad for kicking you out, and you having to return to your dorm room. So, I did some digging to see if I could find more information on Felix. Do you remember Sana?"

This intrigued Changbin. If Hyunjin was good at anything other than being dramatic, it was finding out dirty information on people. "She is the pretty girl from Class 2-b is she not?" Hyunjin nodded. "Correct, but she also lived in the same neighbourhood as Felix and she was close friends with him and his neighbour. So, I asked her about them, and she told me some things, I think you will find interesting."

"Felix his neighbour was three years older than him, Sana told me that the two of them were always together. They would often go swimming together at the lake, one evening, on the boy's sixteenth birthday they went swimming together, but they did not come home. The next morning when the parents found out they were not at the others house they went out looking for them. They found Felix alone at the beach, the other boy had drowned. They ruled it an accident, because the boys went swimming during the night."

Changbin frowned opening his mouth to ask more but Hyunjin held up his hand. "The thing is Sana does not believe it was an accident. She thinks that Bang Chan killed himself. He was gay and was heavily bullied for it. They did terrible things to him; She said that Bang Chan was really good at hiding the bruises and always put on a brave face when he was around Sana and Felix, they only found out after his death." Hyunjin reached out putting his hand on Changbin's arm. "She also said that she believed that Felix and Bang Chan had feelings for each other. After Bang Chan's dead, Felix changed. He stopped smiling, he stopped showing emotions. When he found out that the reason for his best friend's death was that he was being bullied at school for being gay, Felix completely closed himself off from the world and all of his friends."

"Shit..." He mumbled, thinking back at the words Felix had spoken the night before, the way he looked this morning. "Fuck..." He cursed again, quickly getting up from his chair and running back to the dorm. 
Felix his best friend was bullied for being gay. His best friend took his own life, and Felix was there to witness it. 
He thought back at the words Felix had spoken the night before
"I am scared, that everything in touch breaks, that everyone I love dies."
"I still want to love you..."
He cursed again as he ran through the dorm room. It made sense now, so much made sense. If only Felix was there, if he wasn't too late.

When he pulled the door of their dorm room open immediately noticing the emptiness. Panic went through his body as he thought again at the look in Felix his eyes that morning. "Shit." He quickly left the dorm, quickly dialling Hyunjin's phone number. "What beach??" He said as Hyunjin picked up the phone. "What?" He had no time for this, he quickly moved to the parking lot. "What beach did Bang Chan drown?" there was a silence as Hyunjin was thinking. "The Blue Beach, it's a two-hour drive from campus..." Hyunjin went on but Changbin already put down the phone stuffing it in his pocket and getting on his bike. He could not explain why, but something inside of him told him that Felix was there. He just hoped that he was in time, that Felix did not do anything stupid.