Spotlights

Rain

^Heere, have this beautiful image of Jared and Evan before I may or may not destroy your emotions with Jared angst :) 

Jared's POV 

Rain. 

Rain was pounding in his ears, soaking him to the bone as Jared watched from the still open doorway. He'd expected it, knew it would happen eventually, but he couldn't help the overwhelming feeling of hopelessness as he watched Evan kiss Connor for the first time. 

Because, while Jared had no doubt Connor loved Evan, he was not the only one. 

It had started in maybe the fifth grade, Heidi and his own mother had become close friends shortly after Evan's dad left, forcing the two boys into each other's company. At first, Jared hadn't thought much of Evan, he was a weird kid, very shy, obsessed with trees.

Though there had been one day, an extremely insignificant day where Evan said an extremely insignificant, simple comment that had changed the way Jared viewed everything. Up to that point he'd been wearing glasses for as long as he could remember, but on that specific day, for whatever reason, Jared had opted to try wearing contact lenses. He'd shown up to school that day, and in every single one of his classes people kept telling him he should wear contacts more often. Jared then promised himself he was going to ditch the glasses from now on. 

It wasn't until after school that day, when he'd been hanging out in Evan's room that entire afternoon, that Jared rethought his choice entirely. Evan had been trimming his bonsai tree as Jared sat on the bed and watched, and after moments of silence, Evan, being his awkward self, set down the scissors and turned to face Jared. 

"I-I, um, it's up to you obviously, b-but I-I personally think y-you looked good with glasses?" he stumbled over his words, and at the end of the sentence, Evan's voice went up as if he was asking a question. 

At the time, Jared had simply rolled his eyes, thinking nothing of it. Why would he care what Evan thought when everybody else so clearly disagreed? 

But he cared. He cared so fucking much.  

And that night, Jared spent a solid hour staring at himself in the mirror, glasses on, as he tried to determine what he should do. And finally when he went to bed, his mind had been made up. 

There had not been a day since then that Jared had not worn glasses. 

After that day, it had become clear to him that he would only ever care what Evan thought. No one else's opinion would matter except his. And as they grew older and more experienced, Jared managed to figure out why. Somehow, someway, he managed to find himself falling for his "family friend". 

And now, as Jared watched Evan fall not for him, but for Connor, he was slowly breaking on the inside. But he said nothing. Just hid behind his sarcasm. Because the Kleiman family was notorious for being terrible with expressing their emotions, and Jared was no exception. 

Jared let out a hollow, breathy laugh. He had no right, no right to feel these things when he'd done nothing but encourage their relationship. Hell, all that mattered to him was that Evan was happy.   

And so Jared stood there with a smile, even as his tears began to mix with the rain.