The Burning Barn [BxB]

Chapter 5

"I can't believe you convinced my dad to let me get her" Lukas grinned as he laid out across the hay in Beau's hay room. A small black and white puppy wagged her tail as she laid on top of his chest. Beau's heart warmed as he watched the two interact with one another.

"Like you said, I'm magic" Beau chuckled. He laid down next to Lukas, resting his head on his stomach since his chest was occupied.

"That you are" Lukas let out a small laugh before running his hand through Beau's hair. "What Andy said had me thinking... What are we?" His voice sounded distant. As if he wasn't even talking to Beau but more himself.

Beau had been dreading this question. Of course, he wanted Lukas to be his boyfriend... Why wouldn't he? But he was afraid Lukas would think otherwise. That Lukas would still be uncertain.

"I don't know about you... But I'm the happiest I've ever been" Beau admitted. "And I'd be happy doing whatever... As long as I'm with you"

"As sweet as that is, that doesn't exactly answer my question" Lukas chuckled. "But I do feel the same... I'm just confused at the moment"

"About what?" Beau felt a lump form in his throat. He didn't want Lukas to be confused about his feelings toward him. He didn't want Lukas to be uncertain now only to figure out down the road that he never liked him to begin with. That would just be heartbreaking.

"Faith" Lukas admitted. "You know my dad's always been very... Vocal about this stuff. I grew up believing it was wrong and that I should save people like me because that's what God wanted. And then I started to suspect you and I did a ton of research on the difference in opinion..." Lukas admitted. "I don't think God would be as cruel as to give me someone as perfect as you only to tell me it was wrong to be with you... But what if I'm just holding on to false hope? What if it is a sin and I'm just too biased to see it?"

"I had a lot of questions like that too" Beau admitted. "But then I thought about how humans weren't made to be perfect and we can only do our best to follow his word... If we interpret it wrong, he'll at least see that we did our best to do good and had faith in him... I think that's all you really need"

"You always have been the brighter one out of the two of us" Lukas chuckled. "I really do like you, Beau... You know that, right?"

"Of course" Beau smiled up at the ceiling feeling his chest erupt in butterflies at each word. He wanted to stay there forever...

"And I'm really happy that whatever this is is happening" He added. "I've been going through a lot these past few years and I don't think I could have done it without you"

Beau gave Lukas's hand a quick squeeze to show his appreciation but his mind was occupied. He didn't like how lost Lukas still sounded. How he had spoken about the sleeping pills his mother took alongside him saying that he couldn't have done it just made Beau worry.

"I want to move to the city after graduation..." Beau admitted after what felt like hours of silence. Of course, he had already told Lukas this but now he could tell him the real reasons. "I think I could be happy there... I could be myself there... I want to be out to the world and not just you and my mom"

"That sounds good for you" Lukas agreed. "And I didn't know you were out to your mom"

"Yeah... I came out to her in middle school... She kind of helped clear up that phase I went through" Beau sighed. "She's been incredibly supportive... Even offered to switch churches"

"I like to think that my mom would have been like that... I think she would have been over the moon when she realized I found you" Lukas sighed. "Have you told your mom about... Us?"