The Connect

Chapter Thirteen

KIHYUN POV

Hoseok asked me to pick him up from work so we could have dinner at his place. I promised I'd cook. When I got to the gym I was annoyed Hoseok wasn't waiting for me at the door like I had asked him to. I hate it when I have to get out of the car to drag him out of the gym to stop him from doing the extra work he insists on doing.

I drag myself out of the car, rolling my eyes and cursing under my breath. Why can't he just wait for me where I asked him to? Why does he have to do finance work? They have an accountant, he doesn't need to recheck his work every single time.

But as soon as I walk into Hoseok's office at the gym, I am glad I got out of the car, because I find him lying on the floor, curled up and crying, sobbing so loud he sounds like a hungry child.

"Hyung!" I call him as I get down on my knees next to him and grab him by the arm so he looks at me.

"Kihyunie." He sobs, sitting up and pulling me into a hug, crying and burying his face in my chest.

"What... what happened?" I whisper, wrapping my arms around him and hugging him tightly.

He doesn't reply at first, he keeps crying, sobbing out loud right in my ear. I got used to seeing him like this, broken, but it still hurts me deeply every time I do. He..." He trails off and sobs even louder. He tries to speak again but can't say anything coherent, so I just keep holding him, caressing back, pulling him as close as I can, and let him cry in my arms for as long as he desires.

He doesn't stop crying, bawling and sobbing like that for another twenty minutes. He holds onto me for dear life, mumbling nonsense. I keep whispering that everything will be okay, that I got him, that it's alright. He eventually calms down, relaxing his body against mine, drying his tears on my shirt, holding tightly onto me.

"Why don't I get you some water?" I whisper in his ear. "Then you can tell me what's going on." He pulls away from the hug and looks into my eyes. It breaks my heart to see his swollen eyes and face wet with tears. I carefully caress his cheek with the back of my hand and give him a small smile. "Hm?" He nods, sniffing and wiping his eyes with the back of his hand.

When I get up, he does too and sits down on the couch. I get out of the office to grab a bottle of water and a pack of candy in the vending machine then come back, smiling at him sympathetically.

Hoseok eats the candy and drinks the water in silence. The crying has stopped and he's only staring at the floor. I take one of his hands, squeeze it softly then start caressing the back with my thumb.

"Hyung," I whisper. "What happened?"

He takes a deep breath then brings the bottle of water to his mouth to drink the last of it. He puts down the candy and looks at me with worried eyes.

"You're worrying me." I whisper, squeezing his hand a little tighter.

"Changkyunie was here." He tells me.

I gasp. "What?" Hoseok nods. "He's alive?"

"Very alive." He replies. "He's... different."

" Where was he?" I ask

Hoseok sighs. "He said he was trying to get rid of the guys who were after him but... But he was so... he was so cryptic, I don't know..." He.

"Well, did he-- are they gone now? Can Changkyunie come home?"

"I don't know, I mean..." He pauses, grabbing another piece of candy. "He said he'd stay if I wanted him to."

"Well, didn't you tell him to stay?" I ask, frustration and worry starting to show in my tone.

"Kind of... I don't know. I-it was confusing, Kihyunie. I was so angry then so... so fucking sad." He turns his head and looks at me. "Apparently he can free people from his commands. If he wants to tell you to forget he ever told you to stay away from me, you'd feel everything as if he never told you to."

That reminds me of the day he told me what Changkyun had done. That he had forced me to leave Hoseok alone. Made me remember how frustrated and angry I felt but at the same time, thankful he helped me forget a man who would never love me like I loved him. And thinking of losing that scares me. "What?" I ask in surprise. "Really?"

He nods. "Yeah. And he just said 'I free you from my commands' and now it feels like all the sadness I was supposed to have felt through all these years has come crashing down."

"Shit." I lay a hand on his shoulder and squeeze it softly. "Shit, hyung. That's... Crazy."

"I know!" Hoseok groans. "God, it's awful. I feel awful, Kihyunie."

"Well... Can't you tell him to make you stop being sad? Like with his mind controlling whatever."

"No. No." He says, shaking his head. "I don't want him to control my mind. I want to feel what I gotta feel and then get better. I don't want an easy way out. It feels wrong, it feels odd and just uncomfortable, I hate it."

I sigh. "I know."

"I just..." Hoseok sighs. "I don't know."

"How can we talk to him?" I ask. "Is he staying in town? Where is he staying?"

"He didn't say. He barely said anything." Hoseok takes a deep breath. "He was acting so weird, Kihyunie. He has all these scars and he seems so tired and just so... so sad. He was so fucking weird, especially when I asked him to show me what happened when he was gone."

"Weird how?"

"Just... just weird. Like, not like him."

"Well, it's been a long time since you last saw him." I tell him. "And if what he said is true, he must have been through a lot."

Hoseok nods. "I know."

"Well, then we need to find him." I utter. "If he's been through a lot, if he... if he isn't doing well then he needs us right now."

"We won't find him if he doesn't want us to." Hoseok tells me. "He is way more powerful now. He literally disappeared in front of my eyes!"

"Really?" I gape for a second, looking at Hoseok then scoff. "Like teleported?"

Hoseok shrugs. "I don't know. Teleportation? Invisibility? I don't even know anything anymore."

"This is fucking insane."

"I know." Hoseok sighs deeply then rests his head on my shoulder.

"I guess we just have to hope he will come back."

"Why does this keep happening?" Hoseok cries, tears emerging from his eyes. "Why does he show up and leave? Does he want to hurt me?"

"Changkyunie is stubborn. He does whatever he thinks is best for people. He just wants what's best for you."

"He is what's best for me. I just want him back. I want him here." Hoseok buries his face in my chest, crying into my chest. "I won't be mad at him anymore if it means he will stay." He cries. "I just can't take losing him anymore."