when loves around

talk to me

The next morning I stood in the kitchen, danced to Rihanna's music and baked a cake for Zayn, because
he is at home again. When the cake was in the oven I cleaned the kitchen and put on something else.
Half an hour later the cake was ready and I made my way to Zayn's house. Once there, his mother opened the door with a big smile and invited me inside. I went straight to Zayn's room. I opened the door and he smiled at me, too.
"Are you laughing at me or at the cake?"-
"At the cake obviously." We laughed at his joke and then I sat down next to him to give him a peck on his lips and to eat the cake. Because of his broken arm I had to feed him, which was a lot of fun and cute. I just couldn't stop looking at him the whole time. No matter what he did, he never failed to put a smile on my face. Unfortunately I had to go in the evening, but the highlight of the day was Zayn giving me one of his favorite hoodies. That was so cute.

After going home, I immediately put on Zayn's hoodie. I love his scent. I lay in bed and thought again. I thought about the evening, when we were lying under the stars and were making out. To be honest, I would have loved to have sex with him, but I feel so uncomfortable in my body and I am afraid, that he would leave me for not having the ‚perfect' body. I mean, I don't think Zayn will do things like that, but I just overthink to much. I probably think about this TOO much, but it's stuck in my head like honey. I think I should talk to Zayn about it. I should just tell him how I feel and see how he reacts. I briefly considered wether I should talk to my brother about it, I'm probably annoying him again, but I really need his advice. I knocked on his door and entered. He looked at me in amazement and asked:
"What's wrong?"-
"Can I talk to you? I need your advice."
He nodded and tapped on the place next to him. That was a sign to sit next to him and so did I.
I told him everything that was on my mind and my biggest fear about this whole thing. He listened.
"Amira, boys are not what you think they are. Especially not Zayn. I don't know him as well as you do, but well enough to see that he really loves you and wouldn't leave you because of your insecurities. He thinks you're beautiful. You can see that in his eyes when he looks at you. Trust me. And besides, you're beautiful the way you are and you should never change yourself because of a guy."
His words were so meaningful and believable.
"Do you think I should talk to him about it?"
He nodded.
"Thank you so much, Max. I am so grateful that I always can talk to you. That means a lot to me."
Max hugged me and fall asleep.

Now I knew what to do and I told myself to talk to Zayn tomorrow. But first of all i need sleep.

I was woken up by the rays of the sun on my face and when I was slowly waking up, I decided to read a book.
It was now 1pm and I changed my clothes so I can go to Zayn. But before that I called him to make sure he was home.
"Hi babe. Can I come over? I really need to talk to you."-
"Uhm yeah, did something happen?"-
"I'll tell you later. See you. I love you."-
"I love you too."
I felt how confused he was. That's why I started running straight away to be with him as soon as possible.
When I got to his place, I went to his room, as always. He was about to change, so he was only wearing his underwear. He looked hot.
"Oh, you're already there. Must be really important."
We sat down and I started to tell him how I felt that evening and how I would have loved to have sex with him, but couldn't because of my insecurities and that I'm afraid, that he would love me less because of my body. He looked at me a little disappointed and said:
"Do you really think I would leave you because of something like this or love you less?"-
"No, that wasn't what I meant. I'm just scared it might happen."
He nodded, but still looked pretty sad.
"Amira, I didn't think that this topic bothered you so much. But I just want you to know: I want you not your body. That is just a minor matter. I fell in love with you and your character. And apart from that, you're the most beautiful, funniest and loving girl I ever met. I would never leave you because of your body, because even if you don't like your body, I think it's beautiful."-
"Zayn...I...I don't know what to say. Nobody has ever said anything like this to me. I'm so incredibly happy to have you as my boyfriend. Thanks for saying that. It means a lot to me."-
"And because you mentioned the topic ‚sex'. I told you I'll wait and I'll do that. When you're ready, so am I."
I smiled at him and lay down on top of him to give him kisses.
"I love you, Zayn Javadd Malik."-
"And I love you, Amira Smith."