Habits Of My Toxic Heart - Draco Malfoy

Chapter fourteen - Neglected

Draco

This semester had rushed past me in the blink of an eye. I had just gotten comfortable, started enjoying mine and Holly's late night studying in the common room, I had developed my skills on the quidditch field, Flint had even offered me special training since he saw "potential" in me. I felt my stomach turn at the thought of going back home. My coward of a father who managed to not end up in Azkaban with a hair's breadth, he just got more stressed about the Dark Lord returning every year that passed. Fuck. I'd miss all my mates, and I'd miss Holly. She couldn't be compared to the twatheads that were Zabini, Crabbe and Goyle. She was something else entirely. I closed my trunk and waved my wand, using a simple spell that Holly had taught me to make things float. I flicked my wand and the floating trunk made its way down the stairs. I heard a knock on the door and turned my head to see a familiar brunette.

"Mind if I come in?" she asked. I waved her over.

"I might have to tell Professor Snape you're sneaking around in the boys dormitory," I playfully threatened and she shook her head and came to sit beside me on my bed. She looked around the room and then layed her back on the bed.

"I'm gonna miss this," she sighed and I leaned backwards, laying down beside her.

"Admit it, it's me you're gonna miss," I spoke cheekily and I saw her familiar smile light up.

"You know I will. Can't I come visit?" she looked at me and I quickly looked away and swallowed. I did not want her near my father, or even in my house. She'd terminate all forms of contact with me if she visited.

"Uhm.. Can't I come to you?" I asked, knowing very well that neither of my parents would be okay with that.

"Draco, I live in a two room apartment. I bet you haven't even been in a space that small," she looked at me, and she wasn't wrong.

"Can't I please come to your place? Blaise has told me it's so grand and beautiful! Plus he says your mother is nice," she smiled at me and I just now noticed she had dimples. How did it take me two years to notice that? I snapped back to reality as she was waiting for an answer. I couldn't say no, she'd just think it was me who didn't want her there.

"My mother is great, but my dad.." I started and she took my hand.

"I know." SheI intertwined my fingers with hers and I knew she understood. It wasn't a secret who my father was. Or that I loathed the man.

"I really don't have to come, but how are you gonna manage to go a whole summer without me?" she chuckled and her eyes sparkled. I turned my head fully towards her and just looked at her. A piece of her hair fell down in her face and I reached out my hand, stopping midway looking at her, asking. She gave me a slight nod and I reached for the strand of hair, carefully placing it behind her ear. I let my hand linger a little longer than I should have, just looking at her. How had I not realised how gorgeous she was? I let my thumb caress her cheek and I saw her mouth open slightly at the touch of my cold thumb. She finally looked at me and I looked into her eyes, then down to her lips. She noticed and I saw something shift in her eyes. She abruptly got up and cleared her throat. What had just happened?

"I better go find Daphne," she muttered and headed for the door.

"Holly?" I asked and sat up onto the bed. She turned around and looked at me with sad eyes.

"Are you okay?" I got up to approach her but she took a step back. She nodded at me to answer my question before heading out.

Did I just lose my only friend that actually mattered?

***

The whole train ride back home I sat quietly, Zabini telling the rest some shit story about how he had pulled a prank in professor Flitwick's class but I couldn't focus. I looked further down the train and saw her dark hair and I could make out that she was holding a book, reading. What the hell was she thinking? I would kill for a mind reading spell right now. It wasn't like I had intended any of that to happen, I just got lost in the moment, in her. I pushed past all the worrying and looked out the window. I had actually gotten my hopes up that this summer wouldn't be as shitty as the last. I could make it work if Holly came over. I could keep her and my dad apart as much as possible, and keep my mother from embarrassing me. It could work. But now? I don't even know man. It looked like I had to suffer through yet another summer of fights, arguing and being neglected.