What if we met again?

Chapter 14

"And this is just because I need a ride!" Nathan announced coldly when Stana got in the car. "Okay..." She murmured and tried to focus to stop the tears welling up in her eyes. "Nathan, that hand..." She tried to start a conversation. "That hand is my problem, not yours!" He replied sternly. His face was stiff in a strong facade. "So now you don't even want to talk or look at me?" She did her best to stay together, but she was tearing up inside and those small, short, disinterested answers of his came like the sharpest knife straight into her stomach.
"Bingo, you got it!" Another such answer arrived, he didn't even bother to look at her, he just looked out the window completely uninterested.

"Nathan..." She called out to him, but to no avail, she even dared to take his hand in hers to get his attention.

"Don't..." His strong voice was trembeling as he uttered this little word, but he still didn't look at her, he just stared at the streets of Los Angeles.

"Look at me please..." He felt her tears dripping lightly down on his hand, which despite his unwillingness she continued to hold.

"Why, so you can hurt me again?!" He looked at her and all the pain and hurt in his blue eyes were completely exposed.

"No, Nathan, I would never" She rested her hand on his cheek and lightly began to wipe his now teary blue eyes...

"Stana, don't...don't do this to me again, you've already drowned all my hope and buried my heart once..if you do it another time I won't be able to stand it" He removed his face from her hand and looked down because that was all he could do. She was...she was the one who made his blue eyes full of pain now, she betrayed his heart and destroyed every hope he ever had for them.
And it was killing her, she will never be able to forgive herself for hurting him...but she had to do something because that very hope she had destroyed in his heart, that same hope is beating in her heart...

"Please wipe away those tears, I can't look at you so hurt" At the same time, she tried to wipe away her tears, but they just kept coming and going...She knew she was the one who had hurt him so endlessly.

"I could try to smile to hide the truth" He forced a smile and looked at her, but hurt was the only thing she could see in his gaze.

"Don't give me that smile, I want to see your real smile that you gave me all these days before" She looked at him and waited for that well-known smile to shine on his face, a smile that made her smile.

"I had it because of you, but you took it away, too" What’s the point of him smiling at all when everything he so fervently believed in and hoped would become true, shattered into a hundred pieces, he has given up on everything, even this conversation of theirs no longer makes sense to him, she is just trying to correct what she has done and thinks that with one conversation she will wash away all the pain she inflicted on his heart with just that one damn sentence that hurt him like hell. "What about us?" These were her exact words, which when she uttered as if she had buried him on the spot, she took everything from him, the zeal for which he woke up every morning really hoping that all the hope he had in his heart also flowed in her heart. But now he’s got a clear answer, she not only has no hope at all but has never thought about them at all in the way he constantly thinks and can’t get it out of his head...

"Nathan, I don't want anybody to hurt you like I hurt you and-" "If you’re going to recite the lyrics of a song stop right here because people in love do that, and after what you said, I’m pretty sure you and I aren’t that" Nathan interrupted her before she could finish, he had some kind of bitterness around his heart when he mentioned people in love because he really hoped that one day it could be him and Stana, but all those hopes of his sank that moment in the hospital hallway...

"We'll work this out together..." Stana tried her best to find a few words of comfort to comfort him, but also herself.

"No, we won't because you pretty clear let me know that there is no 'we' here!" Nathan once again faced a bitter fate and his heart convulsed as he uttered these words. "I didn't mean to say that then" She tried to fix the situation again and again those damn tears started to accumulate in her eyes."Oh, really, because what you were saying seemed quite clear and convincing to me!"Nathan stiffened his expression again so not to allow all the pain to be visible in his eyes again, but it was a mission impossible, because no matter how angry he was, he was hurt more.

"I wasn't ready to hear that,okay?!" Stana brust out as tears rolled uncontrollably and unstoppably down her cheeks.

"Oh, I'm sorry then, I should have announced to you a few days in advance that I was planning to tell you how I feel about you, would that be better?!" He snapped sarcastically, Stana said nothing and she had just begun to enter the street where Nathan's house is...

"...But guess what, those are my emotions and feelings, I can't just turn them off like a switch!!" Nathan was now already torn apart to the extreme.

"I know and no one asks you to stop hoping or turn off your feelings like a switch..." Stana began through sobs and she wanted to grab his hand so fervently again, but he just pulled away...

"Yes, I don’t have to do it, because you already did it for me, you crushed even the slightest hope I had!" That was the last thing he said as he looked at her with his blues from which shone hurt that none other than she caused. He turned to the door, grabbed his papers from the hospital and before she could say anything, he slammed the car door. She was desperate, all these things he told her, that she was the one who took away his smile, that she shattered all his hopes...It was now or never, or she will now tell him everything that lays on her heart or she will cowardly leave. It will be the first, damn it all!, she decided firmly and started getting out of the car...

"Nathan!" She uttered his name, but he didn't even turn around, he just kept walking towards his front door.
"Nathan, I am talking to you, look at me!" She shouted. "If you want to say something else about how there is no 'us', keep it to yourself because I had enough of your words pierced me, in fact a better word as if someone fired a bullet right here!" He pointed to his heart and squeezed his shirt around where he held his hand.

"No, Nathan, I want it to be 'us'! I have always!" She poured in all the emotions that boiled in her in this sentence and ran towards Nathan who had already started to enter the house and close the door...

"I want it to be ‘we’, I want ‘us’!"Again, this time louder and with a confident voice she repeated as she ran to his door.

" You do?" Nathan paused and stopped closing the door.

"Gosh, yes I do, I want that more than anything, I was just too cowardly to show it" She confessed, she finally confessed and a smile began to show on her face.

"Good! But I don’t, you don’t need to pretend all of a sudden now that you feel something just to fix what you fucked up and to make me feel better!" And with that, Nathan closed the door right in front of Stana...

"I'm not pretending, Nathan, open the damn door!" She cried her eyes out as she tried to speak through sobs, knocking on the door, but that damn door did not open...

You have every right to hate me because I did it again... But what would a story be without chapters like this that simply make us read on!
I can say this, it won’t last like this forever, it will happen soon! Keep reading and find out when!!

Chapter 15 soon!