What if we met again?

Chapter 25

"Nat-Nathan!?" His name cracked from her mouth in a low voice as she was still motionless in a semi-lying position in his arms.

"Yes, Nathan! Who like an idiot, read over and over again that damn note you left, and you're here, partying!!" His voice was resolute, stern and so elevated that almost all eyes were on him.

She couldn't believe her ears! Where does he get the right to shout?! He, he who screwed up all this! Ah, no, no she won't let him yell at her here in front of everyone, like she did something wrong, and in fact he was the one who acted like a real asshole!

"Keep it quiet!" She creaked trought her teeth in a rather raging voice and shot him one warning glare.

"Oh, I have every right to shout and I will!" Recklessly he continued, giving the rage that had accumulated in him to come out. He was in the middle of shouting something, with a look that only radiated anger, when she interrupted him in a low voice, but again loud enough to break through his roaring. "The least you could do is pretend that you're happy for me, we are celebrating the success of the series, but you came and turned this into a shouting debacle." She finished in even quieter voice, not even wanting to look at him..."You're asking me to pretend?! You have no idea what is like to pretend, Stana!!" His voice became even louder, but these were no longer angry shouts, from every word he yelled, only hurt could be read. "Oh, and you sure do..." This time she snapped at him sarcastically.
And for him this was it! He didn't anymore give a fuck that everybody was watching him. When his mouth opened again, his high, stern voice seems to be lost along the way because the one speaking now was nothing more than a small, weak, hurt whisper. "Do you have any idea how it's like to pretend, to pretend it's not hurting you when your heart ache at every thought of that person smiling her dazzling smile to the other guy instead of you?! Do you have any idea how that feels?!" He get quieter and his eyes directing at her but her mouth was not opening. "Well I know, I know how it's like...because damn it, for all those past years I was pretending every single day that I am happy for you even though I wasn't the one you wanted" His voice trembeling with every word he uttered and she's watching him in complete silence. But just a moment later her eyes began to run frantically over the crowd of people who were roaring something in the murmur after Nathan's words. His gaze followed hers and in just a few seconds it became as terrified as hers, because just now, about a hundred people heard his words loud and clear. "And one aplause for this phenomenal performance by fabolous Nathan Fillion and Stana Katic!" Greg's voice broke through the crowd and came as ordered to save the awkwardness at the last minute. Stana and Nathan both distraught but just playing along when they caught Greg's 'just-go-with-it' gaze. And in an instant a big applause overpowered the roaring, everyone tought they were clapping to nothing more that an act performed by two great actors.

"Wow, how realistic it was!"

"As if it were happening to them in real life!"

"This can't be called acting, it is like real life situation, you two can really act with everything and turn it like it's really happening to you in real life!"

Were just some of crowd's comments that caught up to Nathan's ear... If only they knew... If only they knew that this wasn't even a shred of acting, that this was Nathan speaking, that he meant every word he yelled before, that every time his voice trembled, his heart convulsed even more, Nathan was falling apart from within and Stana, who was standing opposite him, not even wanting to look at him and without saying a word, was like an icy shower to him that would water him every now and then, reminding him of this damn reality.

"You two with me!" Greg's voice directed to them, accompanied by a hand gesture, slapped Nathan out of his thoughts, and Stana just caught up with Greg, revealing nothing by her gait or face expression...
While Greg was doing the task of unlocking his office door, Nathan tried to make eye contact with those hazel greens, but soon his soft-blues were cut off by her now dark-greens, his attempt was rejected by her sharp "Don't look at me, don't even try talk to me" look.